Can’t get over it

I took time off work. I had a lovely friend who took me on holiday knowing I would be sad but be happy for a distraction. I started counselling. I started writing. I spoke about it so much because it was all consuming. I'm by my due date now and it's awful all over again. I will never be over it. But I live with it. I hope you find something that helps you. It's okay to feel like utter shit right now because it is just utterly shit. I also followed The Worst Girl Gang Ever on Instagram and listening to their podcasts. They also have a book that I've dipped into. They really helped me validate my grief. Sending all of the love at this awful time. I am so sorry for you loss ❤️‍🩹

I started to feel a better once I’d made some plans for the future. I planned a few weekends away so I had something in the diary to look forward to. Made a new health and fitness plans and a timescale when I might want to start trying again. It was also a bit better once I went back to work and had more structure to my day and distractions. I still get waves of sadness but overall in a better place now 8 weeks on. Be kind to yourself and look after yourself xx

I'm 11 months on, and it still hurts. To be honest, time helps, and after I stopped blaming myself and trying to work out why it happened, what I did wrong, I started to realise that horrible things happen sometimes. It's okay to stay in bed and watch tv or read for a while. Just to distract you from the pain

@Stephanie it’s the second time I see something about that instagram account and podcast. Will surely look into it as it seems like it helps a lot. This type of pain is more than what I thought. It just keeps getting worse. I went from accepting it to just being numb. But I’m happy you found the way to help yourself. I’ll surely try. I wish I could get some time off work, but I’ll have a short holiday next month so hopefully it’ll help.

@Sophie the timing makes me feel hopeful. Planning doesn’t really help me as I tried, but I have no motivation right now. Hopefully I’ll start feeling better in few weeks

@Tasha that’s what I need, distraction. I guess it’s a never ending pain, but it just gets easier to deal with

My tips: read a book, paint, colouring book, chat with someone close to you if you can about what you want to do next and how you feel. I didn’t get out of bed for days. I felt like life hadn’t changed but for me it had, I was excited for having my baby one min and the next they weren’t there. I decided to ttc right after the bleeding stopped because as much as I was scared to have a baby and lose it again I really wanted to try and have a family young (I’m 21). Some people like to fully heal before they decide which option to choose. It’s a good chance to conceive a healthy pregnancy again right after mc. My choice was to try again. But your choice might be different and that’s perfectly normal. You’ll not want to get out of bed and that’s okay. It’s your hormones making you overthink and think bad thoughts so please be kind to yourself best you can. X