How would you handle this scenario?
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I think for me personally, regardless whether it’s his best mate, his best mate should be more encouraging for him to stay and support you? Nights out / holidays can happen anytime but the birth of your child cannot. You’ve carried this baby for 9 months, incredibly selfish for him to consider going in the first place in my opinion, especially if you’re near due date at the same time.
Maybe he could compromise and go for one day/night if it’s actually a best friend . But 3 days and 2 nights I would be fuming
It’s enough notice for you to arrange for someone to stay with you while he’s away.. Personally, I’d arrange for a family member to stay for a few days as it will be tough x
I’d be a little annoyed, sure. Terrible timing but I’m guessing the wedding plans probably pre date the baby plan so it’s not like it’s happened on purpose to get him out of helping you. I’d make plans to have someone come and stay with me while he’s gone. Whoever is most likely to actually be helpful and hands on. A friend, one of your mums etc. it’ll relieve some of the pressure, give you some help and I’m sure given baby is so new most would be happy to do it.
Of course you will be fine, you’ve got this!! Can’t help the timing and it’s his best mate. If the shoe was on the other foot hopefully he would do the same x
Mine is also going on a stag in the middle of May. To be honest I've told him to go. It's 2 nights, 3 days as well. My toddler will be in nursery one day and I've booked a friend in for the weekend. I don't expect it to be easy but it's going to happen at some point.
You are stronger than you think & you will handle the small break trust me 🩷 it’ll be tiring but you’ll smash it. I have a 2 year old and when we had our 2nd, my partner went to work away for 3 months when our littlest was 5 weeks old. I had no village close by either. You find your own routine and do things on your terms 🩷
i’m in a similar boat except my partner’s going to a stag do before baby comes (hopefully), though i’ll be 36 weeks with a 3 year old. i think you’ll be fine, but i’d definitely be making sure you have some time set aside when he gets back for you to have to yourself since he’s getting a break. take his card and book yourself a nice little spa day🤗
thank you everyone for the help and encouragement 🩷🩷🩷 it’s nice to hear a mix of perspectives to validate my thoughts and also provide alternatives/ solutions. think i’ll try to plan for some help if i find the first couple weeks too difficult or if i have another c section. and yes love the idea of setting aside some time for myself too @Aimee
@Meg thank you so much for the encouragement and wow that sounds so difficult but definitely good for you for getting it done and having such a positive mentality
@Mollie that’s what i said to him when i first found out 😂
My partner wasn’t able to get much time off after baby arrived and had to go away for work for a week. I was so stressed out and emotional before he left but it honestly ended up okay in the end. I think us mommas underestimate ourselves and what we’re capable of ❤️ having someone stay with you would be a great help but I promise you that you got this!
I'd say sorry you're a dad now not in high-school time to grow up and have responsibilities
I had an emergency section on the 9th April. My partner goes on his stag do on the 15th may to Spain for 5 days it’s a golfing break. I’m going to my mums so I have that Extra support as I didn’t want to be home on my own so I feel you worries.We had booked wedding / hen / stag before we knew we were pregnant but decided to go ahead with them all. Xx
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If baby is born by then and still only a few weeks old I was definitely ask him to not go so you have support (especially if you don’t have anyone else nearby to help). I had a C-section (planned but turned into emergency as waters broke before my section safe). We have a 3 year old sassy girl and a 2 week old newborn boy and the last thing i could think of right now is him going on a stag doo. It’s bad enough he works nights and goes to bed at 5pm then evenings and then is back by lunchtime the following day. Definitely have a chat with him about it if you feel you’ll need him for support!
Yes 2 baby’s are hard I’ve a 18 month old and a 3 week old and I actually find it easier to parent both kids when he’s at work or out we just compromise so he’s just been away for 2 nights so I’m having a night out on Saturday x
I’d ask him to help with arranging someone stay with you for some support and help , my baby is 9 days old and partners saying he’s going to play football tomorrow I’m panicking how I’m going to cope with a 10 day old and 3 year old for 4 hours . I feel like I want my partner to do his things still but still feels all too new and overwhelming at the moment so can relate with how you may be feeling x
Tricky one as it is a best mate but he does have to think of you too. What if you have an emergency section? If baby is only 3/4 weeks old you still won't be able to drive or lift your toddler. At the very least he needs to arrange help for you for while he's away. (My husband has to go to a client jolly with work for an evening 2 weeks after my planned section so he's arranged his mum to come and stay with me for the night.)