Is working two jobs terrible mothering?
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In the same boat trying to find that balance. Looking for a secondary job that’s part time instead of full and hoping that’d be better but no luck so far.
a lot of people supplement their income
Is your mom going to support your child financially, then? If not, you can agree to disagree...
Being there physically is great but what’s your child gonna eat? Mothering is about sacrifice and you are doing a hell of a lot of that, picking up both parents side of the responsibility and keeping a room over head and bellies fed. You’re doing a great job xx
Your mom shouldn’t be in your business like that in my personal opinion I don’t discuss my personal life with my mother. You do what you have to for your children.
The nice thing about becoming a mom is that YOU are the Mom. They’re your kids and you set the rules. Everyone else’s opinion outside of your nuclear family is simply a suggestion. Water off a ducks back.
You gotta do what you gotta do 🤷🏻♀️ I worked two jobs and went to school with my first (I was a single mom no help from her dad) I know I wasn’t there a lot but the time I did spend with her I made the most of and she had clothes a roof over her head food and everything else she needed. Later on I was able to have one job that paid well and still I was away a lot working 12 hour shifts and overtime but when I was off I made the most of the time with her and she had everything she needed. If being a terrible mother is making sure you have enough money to live I guess I was a horrible mother 💁🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
@Kay i can't switch to parttime on my night job either but i like the money anyway. it's just that my daughter is turning two and my mom has been watching her day and night and I understand her but im scared to quit a job.
i asked for a daycare voucher but i have to follow up on it
I feel as though even with two incomes from two partners it wouldn't be enough if you wanna live comfortably and decently
If I was on your shoes, I would downsize into a studio so i could (maybe?) spend more time with my child (if the math shows that’s possible/even if I could work 1 full time, 1 part time, it’s better) and devise a long term plan to move somewhere I could better afford (even if it’s just a little a month, I’d put it away into a high yield savings account for that). Then I’d replace the time I was using for the full time second job for advancing myself (getting into a trade program maybe so that after, 1 salary could be enough without struggle). Obviously this might not be possible but you have to work out the math. Single parents working 1 job can usually get assistance if their income is lower which can temporarily help you with going into a trade. If you don’t make some change, you’ll be stuck in this life/this cycle. I think your mom’s making somewhat of a valid point in that you need to be
more physically there for your child. But food on the table/roof over head is also very important/necessary. I would just be looking for a better balance.
It’s hard as single parent for sure, you are doing amazing by working hard and still finding time for your daughter. Unless your mom is going to help financially with you working less then I think she needs to understand you are doing your best providing and supporting your daughter. I had 2-3 jobs for years and also lived with my mom and step dad who helped take care of my kids. I worked to pay for my own things, to help pay for my children’s necessities, my rent and food for the whole household. It would be different if you were out with random guys or partying every weekend but when you’re doing your best to survive that’s all you can do for the time being. Children get older, they eventually see and understand everything you do for them and one day they verbalize how grateful they are for everything you have provided and even you loving them. If your mom is okay with it and loves your child then keep moving forward, working your butt off and make moves that will better your future.
It’ll all be worth it in the end and as your daughter gets older it does get a little easier. Good luck mama, you got this 💪🏼🩷
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@Denise that would work too, i could go back to the original plan of nursing school and work nights. change is scary. i know i can't work two jobs the rest of my life either.
Do you think anyone EVER asks that question about fathering?
I was working 2 jobs and only have 1 now, but I just applied for another job because the cost to live is high and rent is very high so well done for having 2 jobs It's not easy. The only downfall in having my 2 jobs was I was consistently tired😩 my health was so bad
Following. I live in Florida too as a family of 6. Just had a baby 2 weeks ago and have 3 other kids. I'm thinking of working 2 jobs to help out more financially