Dealing with abandonment

This sounds so tough and I do understand to a degree and have similar feelings. Have you considered any form of talk therapy? It could be really helpful. It’s definitely something I’m thinking about doing once I’m back at work and have the income as I do feel that motherhood has made me more anxious about fear or loss and the big one for me is fear that something will happen to me and the impact it’ll have on my son xx

It’s really tough, I basically have a fear of people leaving me. And it happens a lot and has happened a lot during adulthood too. I struggle to make friends and my family live away from me. I do have my partners family. I have been told to see a therapist but honestly, that just scares me more tbh! I do have a girl that I’ve known for years and we are good friends, but it’s the same feeling of what if she leaves and I’m yet again alone ahha, it’s a viscous cycle tbh!! I think it’s been triggered more so because I girl I knew for ages basically went from speaking to me for ages and then nothing, and I haven’t done anything wrong for that, and it hurts! Yeah I understand what you’re saying, I also think that! It’s so scary xx

@Shannon I understand and totally get you. A lot of the friends I see regularly now are my husbands friendship group rather than ‘my own’ friends and haven’t carried friends from childhood the way he has which I struggled with when I compared. My husband has had counselling and gone to therapy from uni so he’s always been a really big advocate for it and encouraged me to go and I’ve always avoided it! I agree it’s so scary. But, I feel more motivated now I’m a mom and reckon it can only be positive so I can ‘cycle break’ with my son. Honestly, I’m here if you ever want to talk!xx

Yeah I get you, it’s hard isn’t it. I moved away from my friends and family years ago to be with my partner so started all over again and I’ve never really had a proper friend tbh. It’s very hard. Thank you so so much xx

I definitely think there's some childhood trauma here, but subconsciously, which is why a therapist would definitely help!

@Gabriella yeah there is, I have always dealt with people coming into my life and then leaving, and I think because it still happens now I question what I’ve done wrong, when I probably haven’t done anything

@Shannon 10000% understand this! I definitely think finding a good therapist will assist you in navigating around how to cope with these abandonment issues so that it doesn't rub off onto your children or cause them any damage ❤️ If there's something I wished I did before having my child, it's sort out my childhood trauma 😬😅