I feel really bad

I left my baby in the swing right next to me as I worked on my computer and noticed she was struggling when I looked she had her little teddy bear/snuggly buddy on her face and it was suffocating her she then started crying as soon as I gasped and took it off. I feel so so bad and like a bad mother honestly . My babies five months old and I love her so much but i’m not sure if I’ll ever want another baby which is sad cause I wanted lots of kids but it’s been a mental health roller coaster with me feeling guilty all the time to the point where I just want my thoughts to stop sometimes. The guilt is so incredibly strong with something I have never experienced before and I don’t want to do anything but sleep and take care of my baby and if I do I feel guilty

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It’s ok to not be ok. Highly recommend speaking with a therapist. I found an amazing one for postpartum/family concerns on grow therapy online. It literally has me living again. Hugs and best wishes to you

@Chelsey Mirabel thank you❤️ I’m a first time mom and have no family around only my husband who works full time. Is this extreme guilt normal?

My therapist said “It is very common to feel immense guilt after having a baby but it’s not to be confused with being normal. But that’s why I’m here to help you”

I feel the same way and I recommend a therapist too because it has definitely help me. I love my baby but I hate being a mom and don't want to go through this experience again which is sad because I also thought I wanted more than one kid.

I've done that twice to my baby. Once with a blanket, next time was with a stuffed animal that was wide it covered his face and his arm were flaring around until I removed it, he bagan to cry hard and I felt like a monster and was scared to take care of him for a few days following. However, after falling apart for a few days, I later realized my LO needs me to have it together. I told myself I just need to learn from those experiences and make adjustments as needed. It's easy to be hard on yourself, but if you're a first-time mother, there are a lot of changes, and it is extremely overwhelming. I'm sure you're exhausted and doing your best. We all make mistakes. Your situation sounds very similar to mine. I do recommend therapy to help with the mental load. Just know you are not alone, and this incident is not a reflection of who you are as a mother. You are an excellent mother because you care enough to feel so guilty. Stay strong 💪 💐

Sending you virtual hugs mama. We will never be perfect and I agree with an earlier comment about talking it out with a therapist… it takes a village to have a baby and I’m sure you can benefit from it since it’s just you two!

The guilt is very normal! Motherhood is not easy and the journey into parenthood is so different for everyone. We don’t all have a perfect, heavenly, honeymoon phase and that’s ok. My son rolled off the bed twice on my watch because I was distracted with a work call coming in. I found balancing a demanding job and a newborn and all of my body (physical and mental) at the same time caused postpartum anxiety. I didn’t have family around either and my husband went back to work after 2 months. Find a village, circle, a person or therapist 🩷 My son is almost 22 months. It gets easier, but not because your child suddenly becomes easy. Mostly because you get stronger and more confident in your new life with that little one. Best wishes to you!

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