Stepson showing penis

I’ve put a baby camera in the bedroom tonight until I can think of another plan, just to make sure my son is safe from this type of behaviour

I think it’s valid to have fears. This doesn’t mean that stepson would do anything harmful in the future, but unfortunately it could be recognized as a stepping stone towards inappropriate behaviors. In my opinion, future actions would be a camera/baby monitor in the shared room and emphasis on bodily autonomy in the home. Thing like No means no, understanding body language , and being an example of appropriate behaviors towards other people and their bodies. (Not to say you don’t already do this). Mostly giving grace about it though. Shame and guilt are intense triggers for countless inappropriate behaviors, so just remember he’s still learning how to be a good member of society. It may take time.

I would be very concerned as to where he learned that behavior.

Totally agree with KayLee, this behaviour was learned somewhere. I'd be asking about who this young boy is spending time with. I'd also be concerned with your 2 other littles, definitely valid.

The fact your husband is saying this is normal behavior is a red flag… not saying your husband has necessarily was abused or anything but maybe it’s something that’s normalized in his family… so I would be asking a lot more questions…

I would be concerned, however, to an extent.. this can be just him being a curious boy.. it may be learned behavior, it may not be. My 2yo had literally never been apart from me when he decided to randomly pee on his baby brother 💁 it's definitely a teaching moment and time to ask questions.. but not 100% sign of abuse.

Normal curious boy behavior is one thing, specifically trying to get another person to touch his privates and then being mortified upon getting caught is another. There’s definitely layers to this being a teaching moment as well as protecting the other littles and then counseling with the 7yo to see where it’s coming from. I would hope your husband takes the proper steps to make sure his son is 1, okay and 2, learns not to do this again. How’s your relationship with his bio mom? Could you bring it up with her? Perhaps another woman wouldn’t brush it off like husb did.

A normal curious boy behavior is doing inappropriate thing with his penis at 2 years old. At 6 years old or that little boy lack of teaching from his caretakers (educate about consent must be done at early ages nowadays), or he saw or was victim of inappropriate behaviors. In any case that should be taken seriously. Not only for the safety of your 2 other kids but also for your stepson sake. Your partner is reacting very weirdly to that situation. I m very sorry you have to deal with that. I would put a camera in your kids bedroom (with recording) and I would hide small cameras in other places of the house, try to get information from stepson (how he could have learned that was ok? Was he exposed to videos online (porn!)?, ...)

Thank you for all your replies. I did think it wasn’t normal behaviour having 5 brothers this was never a thing in the household. I agree 7 year old has either seen someone else do this or learnt it somehow. I’m going to bring up to husband about him talking to someone about counselling for stepson to see why he thought he this was an okay thing to do. He’s been told about privates and educated when with us that they stay that way. But there is now no way he’s being in a room with my two little ones without an adult present as I’m so scared what that situation could have developed into had I not walked in.

I would be concerned. Do not take this lightly

Okay so nothing my husband said went in. As stepsons woke up this morning and asked my two year old to sniff his bum 😡

He is being taught that. Wouldn’t be around the baby alone period

I’d be looking at eveyone that kid is around funny cus wtf

I would be very concerned and on high alert. While I understand that some kids are just curious and want to explore parts of their body, it’s not okay to brush this behavior off. I was introduced to sex at 6 years old by my cousin and best friend who were also 6 year old girls. We all grew up in my grandmother’s care as she ran an in-home daycare. I am scarred deeply by the sexual experiences I had as a young girl and believe that any age is the appropriate age to teach right from wrong. You need to have a serious discussion with your husband about how wrong this behavior is and about protecting your 2 year old and 3 month old. It’s not the stepson’s fault. But it is not okay to ignore this and consider it a norm. Question everything, especially your husband and the other influences around this young boy. Don’t feel guilt for these feelings, it’s not a matter of “step-parent drama,” this is a matter of safety, boundaries, and respect in your family’s home regardless of which child.

I was conflicted because it can seem like normal exploration, at that age they do know better and I find it also concerning…so I asked ChatGBT and she said: The stepson’s embarrassment and tears suggest he understood that what he did was wrong, but it’s important to explore whether he truly grasps why. 2. Supervision is Essential – Given the age gap, it’s reasonable to put stronger boundaries in place. They should not sleep in the same room for now, and all play should be supervised. A “rule of three” (where an adult is nearby or a third child is present) can help prevent potential incidents. 3. Understanding the Behavior – The stepson’s actions could be: • Innocent curiosity taken too far • Exposure to inappropriate material (Has he seen or experienced something concerning?) • A sign of deeper issues (Children who have been exposed to inappropriate situations themselves)

4. Parental Follow-Up – A calm, structured conversation is needed to explain body boundaries, consent, and respect for others. Depending on how the child responds, professional guidance may be helpful. Next Steps: • Set clear boundaries (no alone time with younger children, no shared sleeping arrangements). • Have age-appropriate talks with both children about private parts and personal space. • Monitor for patterns—was this a one-time event, or does he try again in different ways? • Consider seeking a professional opinion (e.g., a child therapist) if this raises concerns about potential exposure or deeper behavioral issues. Her fear is understandable, especially with a new baby, but rather than panic, she should focus on creating a safe, structured environment while addressing the stepson’s behavior appropriately.