MIL is pushing me

That is BAD BAD BAD. Your partner needs to shut that down. Someone who is that aggressive needs to be away for a while. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this

@Ali he told her off for the kissing which turned into an argument but he’s so used to his mum behaving this way that he says “she’s means well”. He didn’t see her trying to force our daughter out my arms and I feel so so sick. It feels so tricky to navigate because at the end of the day that’s his mum

I am so sorry you are going through this! Stand strong mama! Do not second guess yourself! Next time she tries to tell you how to parent smile and thank her, and tell her if she’d like to parent a child her son is right there. Your hubby needs to shut that shit down, and honestly be a bitch, if anything blame hormones. But you bet your sweet ass your choices are all correct, and even if they weren’t how you parent is your choice. It’s not worth arguing. I kill them with kindness or literally just stare at them and ask them to explain themselves, request they cite the medical journals that gave them the right to voice what mustn’t be just their opinion because it would be truly rude and disappointing if they were just saying this to make you feel bad and not actually grounding in this in science as truly necessary to protect your baby…. Watch that bitch STFU.

And at the end of the day, you are his wife. You are in a freshly vulnerable, postpartum state, and if he does not have your back, this will affect your marriage for the rest of your life. That is what he needs to understand. Your mother-in-law becoming a grandmother is not the same as you becoming a mother for the first time. It is vital that you feel supported and loved during this time and if he cannot see that he needs to talk to a friend who’s had a baby he needs to talk to your obstetrician, he needs to talk to a pastor. He needs to talk to someone who’s gonna help him understand that you are super sensitive, and your feelings right now are the absolute most important thing.

His mom or not, if ANYONE tries to force my child out of my arms they are getting kicked hard! You should definitely tell your husband exactly how you feel. Just bc he might be used to her toxic behavior doesn't mean you have to deal with it. Especially when it comes to your child. He's making excuses for her. If she can't show you respect & listen to your rules that you set for your child then she shouldn't have access to you guys until she changes

Why are you still allowing this woman to have any contact with you. She needs to be told to back off. People treat you how you let them treat you

At this point I would cut contact with her. That may give her a reality check and she might understand she better not to mess with your boundaries. If she doesn't have any consequences, she will keep on doing that. Good luck.