I want to be a better wife
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't have been so harsh on my husband, but sometimes I feel like it's justified, since he doesn't help me with the baby or around the house. In the end, we both suffer from depression and a lot of stress. I just don't understand. If we're both depressed, why do I have to get up every day and do everything, while he can't do anything?
But I'm in one of those moments where I feel like I shouldn't be angry with him all the time, but I can't help it. It's so hard to control my anger and say hurtful things to him. I need to stop, but how?
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Thanks for your kind words, I already talked to him multiple times and expressed my frustration but he says he can't help more, also he denies to go to therapy, he says that doesn't work 😢
You shouldn't be too harsh... but it's a human struggle. It doesn't sound like he is willing to step it up, which is only going to continue you both in your downward spirals. He either needs to find a way to help, or you might need to find a way to separate for a bit for peace of mind & to sorry yourselves out individually before you work on things together.
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You're carrying a heavy load, and it's understandable to feel frustrated. Consider having an open conversation with your husband about how you're feeling. Depression affects people differently, and he might not realize the extent of your burden. You could say something like, "I feel overwhelmed with childcare and household tasks. Can we work together to find a solution that works for both of us?" This might help him understand your perspective and find ways to support you. Additionally, seeking support from a couples therapist or counselor could provide you both with tools to manage your depression and stress together. For me, praying to God to be more tolerant to my husband has help. I pray things get better. God bless.