Looking for some advice please xx

I haven’t had my baby yet, but here’s my take: if it’s possible, ask for a different consultant and even midwife if you feel like it. Do not let anyone bully you or push you into making a decision you do not want to make, if you go over your due date after a certain time as you know you’ll be attempted to be induced anyway. I’m pretty upset you’re being treat like this anyway, I’ve been hella scared of a c section and my midwife and maternity care assistant both said to me that a c section would only be the option if me or baby was in danger, and that they generally encourage natural birth as much as possible. Please listen to your own heart. As for inducing labour: raspberry tea (no clue why this works but it does), sex if possible, pregnancy ball (figure 8), walks, orgasms, spicy foods, squats, nipple stimulation and pumping. I’m attempting all these as we speak (38 weeks pregnant over here lol)

I had a c-section with my first (following stalled labour and failed induction) and my experience in this pregnancy couldn't have been more different from yours! My consultant encouraged me to go for a VBAC, even said I could birth on the midwife-led unit if I chose to. She also said that if I go over 41 weeks, only then we'll discuss other options (and those options will include waiting longer). I had a call with the Birth Choices team at my hospital today and they briefed me on all the risks and all the options I had. I provisionally decided to go for the MLU and they were super supportive. Definitely ask to talk to someone else, maybe even consider researching VBAC policies at other hospitals in the area if you have the option! X

Did they give any reason for the negativity toward VBAC? For example, was your first csection in the last 18 months? I had my csection 3.5 years ago for stalled labour and malpresentation and the consultants are very happy for me to attempt vbac. The midwives are also on side and have discussed my birth plan. It does sound like you need to ask for a different team.

I had an emergency c-section with my first and my consultant and midwife are both happy with me trying to have a virginal birth again so that’s really strange they are pushing you for another c-section. Is there any reason other then the previous section they have given you as to why they want you to have another? Just remember how you birth your baby is in your control and totally up to you, it’s your birth plan not anyone else’s. As long as it’s not going to pose a risk to you or your baby do what you want to do. I don’t see why your midwife won’t discuss it with you as my consultant appointment is now more for if I go overdue then my birth plan as such, I made my proper birth plan with my midwife. Go on lots of walks, use and exercise ball as much as you can to help get baby engaged, collect colostrum from 37 weeks and have sex (might seem strange but sex can help induce labour as released a hormone in your body as well as collection colostrum)

I had the situation the first time round with emergency c section. I also feel very unsure about what I want. I tried to speak to my midwife yesterday but she said it was my choice but I want to talk through the options. She also said she was booking me to a consultant and it’ll be for me and the to decide. I felt deflated and a bit lost and I don’t feel very confident in what choice I want to make. So feel you! I have a two hour zoom session with a midwife and others for a talk about Vbac so will see if that’s helpful at all.

Take a look at kemi birth joy Johnson on instagram, she's an absolute angel. Would recommend a call with her to feel empowered.

@Ellie I completely get this. This is exactly how I feel. I’m sorry this has been your experience but I’m equally grateful that you shared as I was really concerned this was my fault somehow which I know sounds ridiculous, but I had what I considered to be really poor antenatal care during induction with my first baby. And I find it challenging to speak up for myself but I can feel that I am getting frustrated by the lack of guidance regarding this birth too so I’m hoping I’ll be able to translate that frustration into advocating effectively for myself. During my first pregnancy, I naively believed that everyone I encountered in the healthcare space knew exactly what they were doing and I trusted everything they said but on reflection I think it was only when the theatre team took over that I truly felt safe. The consultant appointments have been so poor. I’ve booked a birth reflection appointment and my next step will be to ask for a second opinion.

Of course this is all very challenging for mums especially being this close to birth, with children at home etc. I hope all goes how you hope and intend xxxx

@Lauren yes I found it really strange that the midwife said this, she said that because I have appointments with a consultant that the birth plan is between me and them. I was really frustrated because I had spent a long time writing my birth plan and had prepared it months in advance of the 34 week appointment. I might insist on a discussion next time I see her, however, I really feel she does not have any interest in discussing it with me. But also, I’ve had quite a poor midwife experience this time round (rescheduled appointments last minute by them, forgetting to follow up with me re: blood tests, and generally being quite short with me during appointments). Such a contrast to first time round, my midwife at the gp surgery then was absolutely wonderful!!

I haven’t got any health conditions and I’ve had no complications during pregnancy to warrant them pushing for another section. At the first appointment the cons literally spent most of the time talking about scar rupture despite the small risk of this occurring.

@Incognito I think they legally have to present the risks. My Birth Choices appointment was also mostly about risks and while they didn't try to discourage me, just presented options and risks, I thought they could do a better job with presenting the stats. For example, instead of saying that there's a 0.5% chance of uterine rupture, they should have said that there's a 0.5% of it happening which means there's a 99.5% chance of it *not* happening. Same number, completely different story! Similarly, she said there was 4 in 100000 chance of maternal death, to which I interjected and said "correct me if I'm wrong but isn't there a 13 in 100000 chance of maternal death during repeat section?", to which she said "oh yeah, I was going to say that" (I have a feeling she wasn't!).

I think you're also bang on about most people assuming that medical professionals know what they are doing and they have your best interest at heart. I think a lot of them blindly follow their hospital's guidelines as if they were rules set in stone to avoid any chance of litigation. What is totally strange is that it is in the NICE guidelines that VBAC is preferable in straightforward, low risk pregnancies so in fact they should be encouraging you to have one, not the other way round! To be fair, as nice as my community midwife has been, she had never mentioned VBAC to me until I requested my birth notes from the hospital and saw in them that their advice for future pregnancies was VBAC. I had been sure my default option was a c-section until then! But then when I said I wanted one she's been nothing but supportive. So I'm guessing it was another case of "avoid potential litigation by not saying stuff"...