Jealousy?

So my partner trains a woman at the gym. I’ve never really been bothered by this sort of thing but for some reason, it’s really giving me bad vibes. I’ve been dealing with PPD, so I keep telling myself that’s what it is but 2 days ago he told me they fell out over her being sort of disrespectful regarding a gym situation with another trainer (nothing inappropriate or weird, my partner is just really big on being respected). Anyway, I found myself feeling happy that they weren’t talking. I feel super weird because I’m not usually jealous on that type of level but I mean, it seriously was like a sigh of relief. Anyway, today he told me she called and apologized and he ran off to the gym and now I’m back feeling a way about it. 🥴 He’s told me before there’s nothing to worry about when I brought her up initially (and another time or two because he was in the gym longer) but for some reason, I just have a really weird feeling that I can’t shake when it comes to her. I’ve mentioned that I wouldn’t bring it up anymore because I honestly don’t have any proof of any foul play and he’s even said he’d like us to meet as she could potentially be a gym partner with me when I’m ready to go back. Any thoughts or advice on this? I feel so weird worrying about someone he’s training but again, I’m just getting an off feeling about it. Not like he’s done anything or will but it’s just weird and I’m sick of it.

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Ooof. Trust your gut momma. But also, keep your friends close and enemies closer.

@Heidi so true! I feel like my gut is always right! It’s never failed me. I just don’t know what to say or how to approach it. I’m sooo tired of talking about this.

Sounds like he’s emotionally cheating. They probably aren’t up to anything but if he’s running off the the gym when she apologised sounds like he’s got a thing for her

Yeah I would definitely meet her and see their dynamic and see how you feel. And yeah, you could be the least jealous person in the world and a situation can still not sit right with you. That’s totally fair and he needs to acknowledge and understand that. But definitely meet her, feel it out and if the vibes are still off address it again. Promising not to bring something up again isn’t a realistic or healthy promise you can make in a partnership.

I’m sorry but him rushing out at the drop of a hat for a CLIENT is weird. Trust your gut. I know someone personally who is the ‘other woman’ with a PT who lives with his partner who he’s been with for 10 years. Keeps stringing the other woman along telling her ‘I’ve told my gf I don’t love her anymore’ or ‘I’m going to break up with her’ but in reality he’s playing them both and the woman I know won’t listen to me because she’s head over heels. Women’s intuition is rarely wrong. If you feel something is up, try and catch him out. But please don’t drive yourself insane doing so!

Dealing with ppd is hard and tons of emotions! We’re in our head about a lot of things. Your feelings are of course to be considered but so far doesn’t seem anything to be worried about. Kind of the opposite of red flags. He’s talking about her negatively, he wants you to meet, I don’t think he’s into this person. You picked each other. He’s into you. Don’t self sabotage, she prob has nothing on you!

Trust your gut but also trust your partner (if your partner has never given you a reason not to trust him/her)! Might be helpful to share this in the context of ppd and feeling vulnerable / off to your partner, and it could be something that brings you both closer instead of pushing away (hopefully!)

Girrrrl trust your intuition 😒

No amount of money from a client could ever make me put my partner in an uncomfortable situation. I chose my husband not other people. He’s not a jealous person but if he said hey this person is making me feel uncomfortable I’d cut it off. I don’t need a reason for my husband to feel uneasy in our relationship it’s just not worth it. So I expect the same in return. Once those uncomfortable/ jealous feelings happen they will always be there in the back of your mind. That’s why I cut it off and so does my husband. Having the peace of mind that they are gone and not threatening your relationship in any way is worth losing the client. Lose a few hundred bucks, save a relationship. I say nip it in the bud. It’s ok to feel jealous and to say that.

"Honey, that woman makes me uncomfortable." - in a healthy relationship, he'll prioritize you because he loves you. But you do have to respectfully and lovingly tell him how you feel.

I was a trainer for ten years. I’d say trust your instincts. It’s weird that they had an argument like that and he rushed off to the gym when she apologized. It’s weird that he’s staying later than normal. And it’s kinda weird that he suggested you guys work out together. That’s probably not a good line to blur if she is a client of his. But mostly what I know is this, anytime I had a bad vibe about something with men in the past, my intuition had always been correct.