Unsupported - how would this make you feel?

I am going through the assessment process but pretty sure I have adhd and autism. I have struggled my whole life, and at times had good or not so good coping mechanisms, before understanding it could be this. But since having 2 children close together, struggled more internally. I do everything in our house, and never am on top of everything, I hide things in cupboards and am very good at hiding a lot of things tbh. My wardrobe is a total mess things just thrown in, my kids have clothes piled up to be put away but I feel like I'm at my limit. Even doing the washing, drying, cleaning and cooking utterly exhausts me. On top of trying to manage self employment and studying, I am failing at everything. This morning he asked me why I hadn't put some clothes away and just left them on the side in his room (we are togeyher for the kids, but don't share a room, I share with the kids). And I just broke down, it was maybe 6 or 7 tshirts, I'd been in a rush and put them down whilst doing everyone else's laundry too. His room is a dump and I hate going in there so I haven't thought about it since. He says its been there 2 weeks and he's been wondering when I would do it. I said why didn't he do it if it was that important and he said he likes doing me it. Then told me my reaction was my adhd and I was being triggered and feeling offended. I said I was just pissed if he 'understands me so much' like he says he does, why he couldn't just fucking do it himself. He's gone off out to a motivational talk he booked himself on and I've got an activity to take the kids too but my whole energy has been floored. Sorry for the essay. Am I being unreasonable here? Is this my adhd? Is this me?