Contact with father

Hi ladies My ex has been an absolute arsehole as of late. Our baby is 10 weeks old and he has only been on and off around in their life for 4 weeks and has decided to go away so has missed six weeks of babies life. He has messaged and said he wants to see baby but will take her to his house on the weekend. He has nothing for baby at his place what so ever and i do not feel comfortable baby being away from me when he has 3 lodgers who are constantly in and out with people and also smokes cannabis. I have said if he wants to see baby he can see them at my house where I know everything is here and it’s a safe warm environment. What would you do in this situation? I’m really not happy for my baby to be away from me when I have been a single parent since the day she was born and he hasn’t even proved himself as a father at all. I’m not stopping him seeing her I just don’t want her being away from me I’m not ready nor am I comfortable with that. Thank you for reading.

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you should do exactly as you have done, you are not stopping him from seeing baby you are just making sure baby is in a safe environment. if he has a problem with that he can go to a solicitor and get proper visitation and things sorted but if you mention the weed and the lodgers it is likely he will only get contact centre visits as they will also deem it an unsafe environment for baby x

Just because he's said he wants the baby at his place doesn't mean you agree to it. You're looking at the bigger picture here which is good, the environment in which she'll be in, the safety, making sure she has everything there, you're being an amazing mum thinking about all of that. You've acknowledged that he cannot provide those things so you've already seeked out an alternative way, him coming to your house. You're not denying him of his rights to see his daughter you just want it in the most safest possible way. If you two can't come to an agreement then advise him to seek legal advice and go from there! Good luck.

Thank you ladies. He makes me forever doubt and question myself it’s horrible. I do not trust my baby alone with him and him saying that I feel as though was to just scare monger and bully me.