About to be second time mum

I just had my second 3 months ago, and my first was 17 months at the time. We talked about “baby” coming a lot before he was born and would point to my belly say baby was in there. We did a video chat at the hospital too for them to meet but didn’t have my oldest come to the hospital until we left so she didnt have to leave without me and feel jealous of baby staying. We also had her pick out matching stuffies that she gave to him and vice versa, she loved that surprisingly

We are also very conscious of not “blaming” baby. We try not to say we can’t do something because of baby, we just say we’ll do it in a minute or that we’re busy at the moment, then she doesn’t associate the delay with baby. She also seems to have benefited from having her help with things. She takes diapers to the trash. Loves when we ask her to give him his binky back, or a blanket on

I mean, your time with your first born isn't coming to an 'end' the dynamics are just changing. I've just had my second baby, & my first born is getting the same amount of attention, if not even more so, so she feels just as included & not pushed out. She's only 2, 3 in July & we include her in everything, we don't care about her making noise around him, even when he's sleeping, I'm not shushing her everytime she makes a noise, or saying you can't do this because of baby, nothing to make her feel excluded. It's a massive adjustment for her, so just make sure you still include her; & be extra attentive to make her still feel just as special, it's difficult with 2 under 2, but them growing up together is so much more worth it. Your smash it. Don't worry (although it shows you care) x

Definitely felt this way! My first was 21 mos when her sister came and I felt so guilty. The most helpful piece of advice I heard was that they'll never remember a time without their sibling, they'll grow up together thinking of each other as a package deal. Girls are 3 and 15 mos now and it is amazing!