The once! I let it go for SO long before I cut contact with her and my kids have never been bloody happier because I'm happier, physically and mentally. My MIL has nothing to do with my kids; no photos, no milestone updates, no seeing them.... Nothing
Once. I let it happen once and then took a 6 week break. Tried to see how things would be after that and it was ok for a few months then she did some things again so took a 6 month break. Now we only see her in a big group setting and see how that goes. We’ve met once and things were better but we will see.
Good question. I reached the end of my personal limit in December after about 4 larger incidents and about 10 microaggresssions and just stopped going to things without causing a scene or announcing I was stepping away, which I thought was discreet and fair. My MIL cottoned on and called a family meeting (excluding me) about what my problem was. My husband tried to tell her straight but she ended up gaslighting him with a dramatic emotional response. Here we are 8 months later, seeing her every couple of weeks again with no apology. I'd say whatever you do, anticipate her reaction so you can be prepared (we were not) and secondly, stick to it x
I had to leave my sons dad for similar reasons amongst other things I hope things work out w you! I definitely think that you should hold your boundary strong and not let her intimidate you though because the more you let her break your boundaries the worse it will get