Marriage advice

Hii guys, I’m not sure if I’ve normalized a unhealthy marriage. My husband has his own company which means that he is always at work. I just believe that I’m often alone with our two children and I mean after 10pm is when it bothers me. He works construction and he has to do a lot of work. His always gone ALL DAY. I mean from 6am- 12am….i’m understanding but he has cheated on the past which makes me feel uneasy every time it gets this late.. (I tried to leave him when I found out he was cheating but couldn’t afford to leave him right away due to debt and I’m not working) I’ve talked to him how I feel but still leaves for a wholeeee day and says that he does not have to always be with us ????

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He doesn’t have to always be with you guys but you just wanting time or for him to work a little less isn’t an “always” thing. That’s only a portion of his day. He should be more willing to make the time especially if it eases your mind considering he’s cheated before it would be a way to make things better between you two as well. I don’t think you normalized anything I just think maybe he sees what you’re willing to tolerate or he could be taking advantage of the fact that you might not be in a situation to leave if you even wanted to. You’re not wrong for wanting your time he should want to make some time for you. Yes work and money is important but so is your relationship and it sucks even more if you don’t have a lot of friends or family because you don’t have anybody else to really go to besides him.

I understand, I just wish that he would also allow me to do things with my friends. Any time I have plans , he has to ask where I’m going with who , etc when all he does is get up and go. His is for sure using that I can’t leave against me because he leave as he pleases… if I do go out he ends up dropping my kids with his mom which I find unfair because he doesn’t stay with them like I do.

Oh yeah that’s not very fair at all. You definitely deserve to hang out with your friends and have a good time. If he wants to keep dropping the kids off it’s sad but unfortunately there’s nothing you can do. But he can’t be mad at a later date when those kids don’t have a very good relationship with him. I’d still take my time for myself as long as you know your kids are gonna be good and taken care of. Maybe you could find work somewhere part time or do something like DoorDash or Uber eats or something to bring in some extra money for yourself so you can start making a backup plan just in case you want to go. Because it’s not fair at all that he kinda wants you just stuck in the house while he goes off

He's a husband and a father... him saying he doesn't always have to be with you sounds immature. His family should be a priority.

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