Universal credit

Hey, it’s nothing bad it’s just to see what kinda things your able to do atm while your at home with baby, they will ask can you look for work etc but I told them no bc I don’t have anyone to look after my child let alone want to put my little one into nursery yet! so I’ve been doing good so far etc, but my wee one will be going nursery (school) January but I promise it’s nothing scary about going into the job centre for the appointment x

@Em I can’t think of anything worse then putting my daughter in nursery at the moment due to having bad anxiety just thinking about it (let alone thinking of the costs!) I have been searching around for part time jobs and possibly a day or 2 at a childminders but I’m not desperate to leave her 😔I overthink everything and I was SUPER nervous when I received this email but that’s made me feel better😅Thankyou 🩷

@Em so they can’t make u look for work after they turn one? Asking cause my little one will be 1 in January and I had to resign cause I’ve no childcare too. I didn’t want to put her into nursery this young and childminder wasn’t compatible with my work shift. Someone told me you’re ok to stay home with ur little one and they’ll leave u alone until they’re 3 or so but I’m freaking out tbh

@Bruna I’ve also heard they don’t “make” you find work until little ones are at school age.. hopefully this is true 😔🩷

@Sophie I also suffer with bad anxiety and the thought of leaving her with a stranger makes me sick 💔 I hope it is true too!

@Bruna my daughter’s never been left with anyone except her dad. I don’t want to leave her until she can speak and tell me about her day etc in case god forbid anything happens to her! UC is the only thing keeping us going at the moment xx

I got the message to go for one. But then added that I had been applying for jobs that work around my family and then they cancelled it

@Sophie same here! We’ve no family and she’s only been with me and daddy since she was born. It’s so hard to trust anyone with our babies isn’t it. I feel like we should be allowed to be with them until they’re older and can communicate.. we see so many things happening nowadays. I hope everything works out for you x

@Kayleigh oh really! Did you add this on the notes section? ☺️

@Bruna so difficult, grandparents always complain they don’t get 1 on1 with her but what’s the difference if I’m there? Why do you want her alone?😅 ughh! Thankyou very much! I hope everything works out for you to🤞🏻x

@Bruna Ahhh so have a couple years before having to panic about childcare! That’s a relief! X

@Sophie Ikr 🥲 so as stated there this appointment might be to discuss a future move into work or ways to prepare for future work but they shouldn’t necessarily “make” u find a job just yet x

@Bruna I’m so silly did I think to look online!? Nope.. just panic mode 😂😅 Just done a little research and it also says on the UC site that they do like to get you in to discuss after baby’s first birthday xx

@Sophie honestly babe, I put my foot down and told them my daughter wasn’t going into any nursery or anything till she was older and I didn’t care she wasn’t old enough for all that but mostly I don’t trust too easy!! it’s a joke!! it’s like you pop a baby they expect you to be looking for work asap!! Well Karen we’re not all like you behind your flimsy computer and desk!! They actually annoy me and stress me out!!!! but please don’t panic as it’s not as bad as your thinking xx

@Bruna yeah they can, they would be expecting you to put your child into child care!! Tell them your not able to do that as you’ve no one who can help and your not willing to put them into childcare as you struggle to trust people especially with you child bc it’s a massive step for them and scary!!!! so please don’t let them try twisting it and trying to tell you that you’ve got to bc you don’t have to do anything your not ready to do!!cx

@Em I’ll actually show them what says on the gov website that you’re not expected to look for work until they’re three! It’s ridiculous the way they expect you to leave ur baby with a complete stranger to go back to work to literally pay for childcare (ridiculous costs). I really hope they will be understanding

@Bruna I know it’s shocking!!! I told them when my daughter was 1 i physically couldn’t!!! My little one suffers seizures and has done just before she turned 1 and she will be 3 in November and still has them and they expect me to put her into child care while she has them! I’m sorry but how can I leave my child like that!! I hate them so much honestly!!!x

@Em oh no I’m sorry I hope she’s doing better now x they’re heartless tbh I feel like we shouldn’t be put under so much pressure to go back to work as they’re only little for so long. Let us enjoy our babies 🥹 I am currently on medication for anxiety and just the thought of leaving my wee girl makes me physically sick 🤢 I even tried a childminder against my will bc my good friend has her 2 kids there and nothing to complain abt but the lady couldn’t have her for the full week and I was monday to Friday so had to resign. I am still freaking out that I can get sanctioned for not requesting flexible working and simply resigning but tbh it was a relief that it didn’t work out as I didn’t want to leave her anyway!

@Bruna we get there, and I know I get that, I hate leaving my little one as well, my son is 7 but he is so independent but me and my daughter are like glue!! We both have separation anxiety from each other xx