Advice/help on mum burnout please !?!

Please no judgement or horrible comments, I'm really sensitive atm... So, I'm just looking for some advice/help with mum burnout. I don't have a "village" to help with my kids. The kids father doesn't help either really (his not really an active dad). But I'm really struggling with my mental health, everyday I'm miserable, I cry constantly like uncontrollably I can't stop. I'm already on medication for depression and have been for a while now but I have been looking up symptoms of mum burnout and I feel I relate to this so much. I don't enjoy being around my kids, I'm so unhappy, all I do is cry, I'm exhausted like so run down to the point I don't leave my flat... my youngest (1 years old) doesn't really sleep still at night so I'm still having broken sleep. I'm really irritable and frustrated all the time like the kids play and make a mess and I just cry and tell them to pick it up like it's so overwhelming seeing it all and I have terrible mood swings. Recently I've been shouting at both kids due to constant mess/noise etc as I'm just feeling overwhelmed and I'm fed up of repeating myself or going into another room to get 5 mins peace for them to follow me and then 5 minutes later I regret it and we are just sat cuddling on the floor and im telling them how much I love them😭 I want to be the best mum to my babies, they are my absolute world and I love them to bits but I just don't know how. I need a break for me, to look after myself... to breathe. But 1- I haven't got the money for childcare and 2- I haven't got anyone who will help and look after them for me. I feel like I'm stuck in what to do at this point and everyday I'm breaking down, I just can't cope. Has anyone had this before? What did you do to help it?

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I know this isn’t helpful but I actually went on a trip away from my kids and husband and it helped me so much! But the times I’ve had it and I couldn’t do that I just went on walks with my kids in the fresh air and it was so calming and the kids enjoyed the outdoors! Walks always help even if you have a 5 min one… also when kids sleep have a bath do some self care! If you need someone please message me I’m on my own too, all my friends live away I should take my own advice sometimes xx

@Bryony anything is helpful, your experience counts too! Yes I feel like I need some time away from them but I just haven't got the support around me for that😢. I do try to get out but getting out my flat and having to carry my youngest in one arm and the buggy in another up and down my stairs (we don't have a lift in my block and I'm top floor) is just such hard work and I know it only takes 2 minutes but when I can't stop crying or anxiety is really playing up I just find excuses not to you know... Most nights I do have a bath when they are in bed but I feel like my evening is wasted😂 I feel like I've got 2 maybe 3 hours to myself and I've just sat in the bath or sat with the tv on silence scrolling on social media😂 Thank you that means a lot, I just don't really know how to open up to someone and explain my situation when I don't have a clue in my own head myself you know... I'm confused too😢❤️‍🩹

Im so sorry you are going through this, i can relate to this so much, im still struggling but it’s not as bad now since my son has turned 3. honestly just being around family helped me even though I wasn’t around them much but that really helped. I also saw a therapist &just spoke with her about how im feeling. Your doing good mama because motherhood is hard ❤️. If you need someone to talk to then you can message me. Sending you hugs 🤗

It’s nice to just talk to anyone about how you are feeling! Talking to someone you don’t know defo helps a lot!! You are doing an amazing job with your babies we all get overwhelmed, people who say parenting is easy aren’t parents who actually care about their kids!! We are the ones who actually do and carry mum guilt everyday xx

@Rhiana Aw thank you, I'm sorry you are going through it too but glad it's better for you now!❤️‍🩹 I think I've just had so much "bad luck" come way this past year and everything's just built up I guess?! And the fact I don't get a break or even 5 mins away from the kids it's just overwhelming for me and I can't handle it if I'm honest. Thank you that means so much, honestly I appreciate you💕

@Bryony Yes I did have a miscarriage 10 months ago and it helped when I spoke about it... I felt so alone until I spoke up and realised there was a lot more people that had experienced it and I wasn't in fact alone! It was just a sore subject to speak about at the time and no one knew I was pregnant so it was hard to start that conversation you know❤️‍🩹 Thank you that definitely means a lot! I do try my best and even when I do shout at them I instantly feel so much guilt and can't stop crying once they are in bed that I've possibly scared them when I'm meant to be there safe place😢

I shout at my kids, because things get so much and you know when things are happening all at once I have 6 and they could all be talking at the same time and it just gets to me but I always explain why I’ve got cross and they understand but then they all do it again 🙄😂 but people who say they don’t shout do! Nothing worse than when you see all this perfect mother on social media and feel worse about how you can be at times!! Honestly we aren’t perfect but we try and that’s all that matters! Mum guilt is real xxx

@Bryony wow 6 children! You are super mama

Are there any local community hubs you can go to? Im sure if you spoke to someone there like a health visitor or baby class leader they may be able to advise you? Could even help entertain the kids whilst you get a coffee for 30 mins x

I could write this myself....I feel so drained mentaly and physicaly, also no village and partner helps so little

@Nastia honestly it’s so hard lol but I chose this life so i have to get on with it x

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