Cheating partner

I have a 4 year old and 6 month old so this is quite hard. I understand that she’s probably been fed a bunch of lies but would you confront a woman your partner has cheated on you with when you have evidence? Long story short - had suspicions of partner cheating for over a year with multiple women. Whenever they were addressed, I was called crazy & obsessive (the list is endless) there’s always been excuses, accountability’s never taken & it’s never been fully resolved. There is more context to it all but to keep it short the most recent event - my partner went out, came back at a stupid time and said he couldn’t call because his phone and smart watch had died. Few days later, he’s not home from work so I’ve turned on his smart watch to see if he was lying about the other day. The smart watch turns on WITH battery and messages pop up from another woman about what colour underwear she’s wearing, arranging to see each other, what she’s going to do to him etc. (I can’t see his replies) The psycho in me noted her number & took a picture of said messages that I saw from her. After stalking the messages for a while, I sent him a picture of one of the messages I saw. He didn’t read or open my message but definitely saw as his smart watch suddenly logged out lol. I saw that he had booked a hotel for that night - he didn’t come home & hasn’t been home since. (I dumped his stuff outside) Messaged me the morning after saying they are old messages from a few years ago, he doesn’t have her number or her social media etc. - he most definitely has her number saved and messages from a few years ago wouldn’t pop up as notifications. When I asked him to prove it, he said there’s nothing to prove as he hasn’t messaged her😂 He collected his stuff that I dumped outside the door. Half of it is still there. He’s been out, not come home and ignored my calls more than I could count more than he’s been a dad to our 6 month old - now he’s messaging me saying he’s going to come and take our baby etc. The psycho in me is telling me to ring/text this woman as I can’t find her socials to tell her the damage she’s caused but I know she’s not completely at fault as well as knowing she probably isn’t the only one

Show your support

There is absolutely no need to message the girl. Nothing will come out of it other than more drama. It’s not going to change anything and it’s not going to help the situation. She’s not the problem. He’s the problem. Keep him gone! He can go cheat on those women. That is not your problem. Just start the process of moving on from the situation. Reaching out to that woman keeps you in it. Be done.

Tbh I’d add her to ur contacts and try look at her pic on WhatsApp to work out who she is if she has it, if your relationship is known to people around you and in ur area, she obviously knew you was together, and the fact you have a 6 month old makes this even worse! I’d be 100% finding out who the women is because she’s just as bad as him for going through with it if she knew you were together, however if she didn’t know you was together as much as your mad it’s not really her fault as there’s not much she could have done so I reccomend not messaging her if you don’t know of her and she doesn’t know you xx

yeah no keep him gone. he's telling you that you're right and that he was cheating and now that he's lost control of the situation, he's threatening to take the baby. if yall aren't married then go ahead and get court proceedings started. depending on your state, if he takes the baby then he doesn't have to give them back without a custody order in place.

But 100% get him gone, if he has cheated when your 6 months postpartum that is a new level of disrespect! Also if you take him back most men will just cheat and cheat because they know they can get away with it x

I get why you would want to but actually there’s no need to because at the end of the day, it’s your partner who wronged you & caused the damage. She was just a pawn in his messed up game. Messaging her won’t really change anything dear. Put that energy and time into healing & creating a wonderful future for you & your kids. I know it’s easy for me to write this as it’s easier said than done. I do understand and I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this.

Get custody of the baby if it’s his, then file for child support. Don’t let his sorry ass back! You will find someone who doesn’t cheat if that’s what you want for your life! I’ve learned the hard way that cheaters don’t ever stop cheating!

As someone who just went through something similar the girl if she knows, never takes accountability. They play the victim as much as the man that cheated. Both claimed not to know he was married, first told me it was his choice, that she didn’t mean to fall in love with my husband. Second said she was done, and he moved in with her the night I kicked him out. He’s tried to wiggle his way back in and I denied. Try’s to lie to me about all of it still despite the mountain of evidence I have. As someone that has gone through what you’re going through now, and still am. It’s not worth messaging the woman. Because then you go through the turmoil of how a woman can do that to a family with no care, how she can sleep at night.

Oh girl you’re lucky he will take his stuff and just go. Many of us live in his house and can’t afford to live on our own since we stay home with our child. He ain’t coming to take nothing from you. He just knows that’s all he’s got to scare you. Keep him tf out of there and let him live his life. Sorry ass excuse for a man to cheat when yall had a baby this summer like what?!

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