Any advice?🥹

Definitely set that boundary. It’s not ok for him to do whatever he pleases. You have a life too, and a schedule I’m sure. Make it very clear to him what he needs to be doing and if he doesn’t want to do that then it’s not happening. He needs to be more mature as an adult and a parent it’s really that simple. Just be firm and clear. And ignore him making you feel crazy. You aren’t. 🤍

He is seeing your baby when it’s convenient by the sounds of things. You need to set days/times especially as baby starts to set a routine with nap times. Apply for CMS yesterday.

Thanks for your replies 💙💙would it be wrong for me to say no to him seeing him last minute? How would I go about this without making me into the bad guy? Or do I just suck it up and let him be a dad when he feels like it if he is refusing to schedule anything in/be consistent? 🥲I don't want to be accused of being the reason why he doesn't see his son (he has said this to me before even though I'm trying so hard to make things easier for him to see him, ie being flexible with days, times - telling him he doesn't have to see him in the house/around me etc) . I feel like no matter what I do or say he's going to have a problem either way and really and truly I just want him to be a good dad he has it in his head I have feelings for him but if it wasn't for our baby I would have never spoken to him again he's been a bit of a nasty piece of work ever since I was pregnant

Wow I feel I could have wrote this myself. I have a slimmer situation. As my little one is 19months now and since having her, he doesn’t try or bother seeing her or wanting to know about her. He doesn’t necessarily give me money for her etc. it’s just mainly me doing it all and it is draining and annoying. Like he said he wants to be a dad by doesn’t act like it. Anyways, I say you need to talk to him and ask him if he wants to be involved or not. Because, he clearly showing he doesn’t.

Some perspective alterations could be to offer a schedule that you see as fitting for you. If those times don't work for him or his schedule, set a time limit as to when he needs to tell you. For example if you havr offered him to have some time on Monday between 6 and 7 and you now have plans. Ask that he let you know the day before if that doesn't work and then I would also have a sitter set up so that you can still have your time and him cancelling does not cause you any frustration. The relationship is his to build with his child. Not your responsibility. As for money. I say, if you make the baby, you pay for the baby. If I don't want money to be an issue with the other parent. I expect to pay everything on my own and if they provide some it works as a bonus. Money often creates a lot of problems due to expectations that one has. Same idea with lending money, if I lend money, I do it with the intention of not getting it back. If they do pay it back that is awesome. If not, relationship is still good.