How would you feel? Would you leave?

That's financial abuse and absolutely a valid reason to leave babe ❤️

I would love to message you directly. I can’t comment openly on this, without publicly putting information out about my experience, that I consider private. Also it’s a strong chance you might not like my input, but each individual has to do what works for them. If you’re open to my opinion/input my inbox is open

The bank account isn't a deal breaker in my opinion. If he is good at managing the money let him. I would insist on monthly finance meetings with him though to talk about the money flow and budget. I would also insists on having own private account and having funds given to me for spending.

@Kylee this woman is not going through financial abuse. we don’t even know her whole situation or both sides of the story. @incognito please don’t take advice from other people who don’t know your entire situation. If that man loves you, and is providing, sit down and talk with him…don’t uproot your life because of this

@Anna 👍💯exactly what needs to be done

@Anna @Anna well the thing is, he’s TERRIBLE with money and barely provides. He has spent every last dime to the point getting groceries for our family he has resorted to pawning things. I want access because I am constantly worried if we have anything or how much do we have until next pay day. He doesn’t want me to see what he’s spending it on. Which I know majority is for his Kratom addiction. I never know how much we have and where it’s going. He isn’t responsible, barely pays our bills. We just went without our phones for almost 2 weeks but he had money to spend on betting….

@Anna @Anna @Kylee the bank was switched without me knowing, I had to find out when our other account went negative and no checks were coming in. I’ve been told I contribute in no way, so I don’t deserve access. Just sucks I see y’all’s POV

In that case it sound like you both need to go to financial counseling together.

I agree with the other Anna also. I also listen to Dave Ramsey. Dave Ramsey has mentored and counseled thousands of couples and single people. I would calmly sit down with my husband if I were you, (when he’s in a good mood) and in a loving and caring tone, discuss with him how it’s important that you both start making smart financial choices and that you can help with that. Make a spread sheet Budget for bills, needs, and maybe some money you can allocate for “wants” One thing I’m not going to ever do is tell someone to “leave” that’s a decision you got to make on your own, if after counseling, or him shutting you down constantly when you try to talk to him. I never gave my first husband any warning, I just up and asked him for a divorce and it wasn’t because of finances it was because he was cheating and didn’t care about my health. My second husband, I really do love this man, so I warn him, “Hey if this (blah blah) or we can’t sort this out….then you’ve been warned….make sense

If my husband locked me out of our bank account , I’d leave. If he said I didn’t deserve access, I’d leave. If he puts betting over our livelihood, I’d leave.

So he financial abuses you. He has an addiction to kramtom. He claims you disrespect him when he completely disrespects you. He set you up for failure by not communicating with you about switching banks. He gaslights you and says you are the problem when he is the one who is financially irresponsible. It sounds like he is another narcissist. Keeping you financially tied down this way so you can’t leave is dangerous. Start planning your escape.