Recent challenges with stepson since Fortnite!

Does anybody else have struggles with their kids/stepkids because of Fortnite?! I wish I said no when my stepson asked if he could try playing Fortnite on his Nintendo (he’s 13 coming up) I wanted him to enjoy something to do in the evening after school but I’m regretting it now as he has become so addicted to the point he is ‘forgetting’ to do everything to stay in a routine that me and his dad originally had him in. He claims it has nothing to do with Fortnite 🤦🏽‍♀️ he gets so frustrated on there if he doesn’t win the game and reacts angrily towards us sometimes. He’s been constantly challenging me, not listening to what we have to say properly giving us a bad attitude if we ask him to do something or even call him in the room to talk about anything that doesn’t involve the game, we had to put time restrictions in place so he can only play so many hours each day (3 hours on weekdays and 4 hours on weekends) but it hasn’t seemed to change anything, I’m worried about his future because of how forgetful he is in general but it’s increasingly worsened since being allowed to play that game and I feel like a bad stepmum for even letting him go on it, I didn’t think it would cause such issues and this is now a daily problem. I’m thinking about just stopping him playing the game completely at this point but I think it would just make him kick off and do things like refuse to get ready for school, comb his hair and get in the taxi to go, important things to keep him in routine like brush his teeth get up and dressed in the mornings on weekends (which isn’t a lot, we don’t ask much off him) I feel like he’s nearly a teenager and very capable of such basic things. I love him but I’ve just had enough of him selectively listening to us when it benefits him only, but when it’s something that helps us he seems to forget and it’s very stressful as I breastfeed my 7month old and if I get too stressed my supply drops so I’m trying to avoid that effecting feeding times, he doesn’t seem to care about his brother in those moments about Fortnite for example he’s been asleep in his dads arms and he walks in loud ends up waking him up and saying it was bc the game is unfair repetitively even after I told him to consider his baby brother sleeping as it’s an important part of his development as he’s new to the world but he just doesn’t seem to be bothered. He’s 13 nearly and I feel he is atleast grown up enough to understand some aspect in that situation.. Am I wrong for feeling stressed and partly irritated at him at this point? This is a daily feeling for me, I don’t want to keep being negative towards him criticising every little thing he does but it feels like he does it now to get a reaction out of me and I’ve run out of ideas on how to lead him down a better path instead of being stuck on the sofa on his phone and Nintendo and not wanting to do anything! I’ve tried encouraging drawing, playing with some stuff in his activity box but he loses interest very quickly. Any advice on how to handle this, it would be greatly appreciated because I’m at my wits end with it all.

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I think it's hard cause he's 13 and will be the same with all his friends it games not much interest in anything else at that age my ss is 10 and he loves fortnite but I've got rules in place so on weekend it's breakfast showers teeth before he goes on and we also have a no tech rule until 9 so no tech before school at all I must admit think that one hit him a little as he didn't want to come threw the week as he can go on whenever at his mums and then we make a point of doing something else on weekend just so it's not all about the game we went geocatching or whatever it is he really enjoyed doing that we also have chores before games too that seems to get him motivated to do them before he goes on anything if he is forgetting to do things I would forget to put Internet on.... I've also done that a few times it is frustrating but try not stress yourself because he won't care and the only person affected is you that's how I started thinking sorry its not very helpful xx

I will also add it's really hard to play on a switch 😂 I do play it I have it in my phone and on ps5 and they are way more easy and it's less frustrating me and fella play when kids are in bed and yeah it did stem from ss playing it my brother and sister also play it 😂 they are 26 and 14 and that's how ss got into it maybe have a word with him if it's something you could do getting a actual console for Christmas if he hasn't got one already providing behaviour changes it might stop with the shouting and bauling as much I've also used the well if your good do everything help out ect you can have v bucks 🙈 x

I have no advice but I know where you're coming from. My 9 year old step son is addicted and the range he gets when he doesn't win is a struggle. He won't go out or go to any clubs when he is staying with us because he just wants to play his game. We try and have no Internet hours to have family time and play Uno (house favourite for us). If we take his game away it is horrific. He games until late at night and we have a no phone rule (one night he stayed up all night playing his game). Here for advice too! His mum let him play it and he's been playing it for a year.

@Tasha I would seriously just turn the Internet off at a certain time so he can't game late at night it is an Internet game certain consoles you can put timers on them with the parental control so they can only play so many hours a day and then if you want you can adjust it if you can't just turn Internet off could go old school and at a certain time just take the fuse out of plug 😂

@Roseanna oh yes I know as I play Fortnite myself on ps5 🤣I just don’t spend the whole day on it and I’m trying to teach him that his life doesn’t just revolve around Fortnite especially as its effecting his memory and listening skills, wanting to go out etc we have already tried the vbucks we do a tick chart with him on the fridge board if he’s good he will get rewards, but it’s a great idea getting him to do chores before he’s allowed to go on it, might encourage him tbh. Thankyou for the advice n I’m glad I’m not the only one going through it 😂xx

@Tasha it’s a nightmare isn’t it and causes so many problems. Funny enough we spoke about trying to play uno as a family haven’t got round to doing that yet n that’s not good him staying up all night. What does he play Fortnite on? If it’s Nintendo you can set up timers on an app that can link to it and you can turn it on n off anytime x

Haha @Skye nice to find a mum who does it too 😂 it's so hard ATM to get him to do homework I end up incorporating fortnite just so it gets done haha the Joy's x

Is it because of Fortnite or is it because of his age haha I ask because 13 is a tricky age where they’re attitude and don’t listen etc! I’m a big advocate of limiting game time I see the impacts in work so my son is only allowed 2 hours Monday - Thursday and longer on weekends but a time cut off too! Does he have any additional needs? Just with you saying refuses to do things and important to keep a routine etc as my sons ADHD and we see this as well!

@Amy oh yes.. I actually considered his age but realised all the listening problems started more regularly with him since playing that game😅🤦🏽‍♀️it’s probably a mix of both. His anger has got worse, he is autistic but I don’t wanna put it down to all autism as some of it is behavioural habits and I’d say that’s a fair routine you have him in FairPlay to you 😊 x

@Roseanna deffo I agree haha, yeah I can imagine the game takes over everything lol x

Don't get Uno no mercy! We are all too competitive and it's ended in tears with my step son. If we did that he wouldn't come and spend time with us anymore and his mum would kick off about us doing that. I'll talk to my husband about it though x

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