We have been together for almost 19 years married last year and the first few months after baby have been hell for us, every day was a fight and I mean every single day, screaming yelling me crying, he started being afraid of me leaving him and so on, at some point I started wondering if we would have never survived this but we did. We are still here. A lot of work had to be done, talking communication and me going out from the ppd. This can affect dads too. You have to talk and listen to each other. Men are not as good as us of doing things, we can do multiple things at once they simply can't, they are not born for this. I sometimes get angry at him for not doing things around the house, he always awaits me to tell him do this do that. I mean you can see there are dishes in the dishwasher or on the sink, laundry to do, bathroom to clean etc. no he simply awaits for my order 🤣 he helps eh but yeah he doesn't take the initiative, sometimes he does but most of the time he doesn't. I learned to let it slide...
...unless it is really important for me to say something. Do the same for the sake of the both of us.
My baby is 6 months and my gosh the first few months were so hard for my husband and I. The older baby gets the better we get but each stage comes with a new set of challenges. Everyone is sleep deprived and cranky so we snap at each other all the time. I’m breastfeeding and home all day with the baby so get frustrated that he gets to sleep while I’m up constantly through the night. Baby always wants me when he’s grumpy for comfort because I’m breast feeding so my husband feels useless and that gets him down. At the end of the day the first 12 months or so are the hardest because you’re both learning and both so focused on baby that you tend to not prioritise each other. It’s a big adjustment adding a little person to the family and having your whole life change. You need to make sure you keep communicating with each other and make sure you find time for just the two of you
Sounds like post partum depression! My husband also has it. It’s led to regret, lashing out and just not being himself. Try to find patience and grace, but also stand up for you and your child. Recommend seeing a professional to talk through his feelings. You can dm me if interested!