Domestic Abuse - Please help
I don't know if I'm in an abusive relationship or not and I don't know if things feel / seem worse because I've just had my little boy and I'm hormonal etc but my Husband is just being so horrible to me at the moment. I know as I'm writing this what it sounds like and there's no excuse, I've been making excuses for him because he's going through a lot of stress, his Dad has just been rediagnosed with Cancer, he's had an Uncle also diagnosed with Cancer and another Uncle pass away plus a lot of work stress and he's not coping but he takes everything out on me. Won't talk to me, grunts and snaps at me when I try talk to him and worst of all always calling me names for literally no reason, it's like he doesn't even want to be in the same room as me, we barely talk. I feel so lonely at the moment, I had a csection so can't walk far or drive, he won't really drive me anywhere and I haven't really got anyone else that can come see me or get me. Throughout my pregnancy I struggled so much because he never once helped me with anything, he very much has the mindset that because he works and earns good money that he doesn't need to do anything else round the house etc. We've got a Daughter that's 2 and he won't do anything with her, don't get me wrong he loves the kids to pieces but he has severe social anxiety so won't go anywhere or do anything with us as a family. I know he has a lot of mental issues and I've tried getting him help but I just think there's more to it and I just don't know what to do. He did the same when our Daughter was born, we've been together about 15 years and I would say the majority of the relationship has been shit and on his terms but it got really bad when our daughter was born and now it's starting again and I don't know if I'm more sensitive being postpartum or if I'm finally coming to my senses. I feel so shit and alone at the moment and I just don't know what to think or what to do. I don't even know how to get help or where I would go.
I'm sorry for rambling but if anyone can offer any advice or kind words I could really do with it right now. It's my birthday on Monday as well and I'm just dreading it knowing he won't give a shit, always forgets it, I had to buy my own present for him to wrap for me. I've just had enough, I don't think I deserve this and if I get upset and try talk to him he makes me feel so stupid like I'm being oversensitive and won't listen to me. I just don't know what to do. Please help.
I’m so sorry for your situation. He doesn’t sound like a nice man . Very narcissistic 😭 it’s a very hard situation to be in . But no one should ever get treated that way ! He should have been helping you throughout the pregnancy and now especially cause you had c section 😣 maybe see if you can speak to domestic violence helpline and see what their advice would be . It’s hard because children are involved now but I would suggest getting a divorce and getting some help . As a single mom you get a lot of help here . He doesn’t seem to care about the children either as it seems . Do you have any family you could go to ? Coming from a divorced family it’s hard but the younger they are the easier it is . I was 12 when my parents got divorced but it was the best to thing for them to do . They are small now but the longer you leave it , it’s gonna leave scars on them . It’s not a nice thing to see your parents fight . he should be an idol for the children and show thow much he loves them and u