Relationship after baby

I feel like the worst mother ever posting this but does anyone miss their pre baby relationship. I love my son more than anything and wouldn't change my life now for the world but I am finding it hard. It's a Friday night and my husband and I planned a date night at home, nothing special just a bottle of wine and a takeaway but our son has woken up 4 times already since being put to bed at 7pm, we just don't get any time just the two of us. I just long for one of our pre baby Friday nights where we could have a take away, get a bit tipsy, have sex and stay up talking shit until 3am. Our little boy is our world but sometimes I just miss the way we were before he was here and how easy life was! He's breastfed so we can't leave him for very long at the moment so we haven't had a night off since before he was born and Im missing time just the two of us. Basically what I'm saying is I want a proper baby free date night with my husband, does that make me a bad mum 😂😂

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“Now is not our time, it’s their time”. You’ll get those dates back but for now, enjoy them being little and needing you xx

You’re not a bad mum for thinking that at all! This shit is so hard and it’s a masssssive life change, completely normal to miss what it was like before! Keep making an effort and trying for those dates it does get easier I promise. Mine is ebf but we decided it was too important for our relationship to not have some quality time together and left her with my mum overnight with formula and she was absolutely fine, back on the boob the next day and me and my partner felt reconnected. You guys are important too ❤️❤️❤️

Your not a bad mum at all! I felt like this for so long so ended up biting the bullet and asking my mum to have him overnight. He loves his nana and grandad so didn't feel too bad about leaving him. Making time for your relationship is also important xx

Thank you for your lovely comments. My husband and I really want to prioritise our relationship as although our son is our everything, without us there would be no him! We want to maintain the solid foundation of our relationship to be the best parents we can for him! It's so reassuring to hear positive stories about leaving your baby over night, it's definitely something I'm going to consider in the new year xx

It's so nice to see someone saying they want to prioritise their relationship, as I completely agree with you on how important it is! So many parents (mums mainly) purely focus on their children and neglect their relationship, which seems fine when your kids are small, but then find their relationship is dead 10 years later! Could you maybe try introducing a bottle? With either expressed milk or some formula? That way you can have someone look after him overnight, allowing you some much needed quality time together!

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