Cry it out
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Explain to him that they literally don’t know how to regulate emotions yet because that part of the brain hasn’t developed yet. Explain that “cry it out” method actually works at times but it’s unfortunately because baby’s central nervous system goes into overdrive and shuts down. It can be hard when our partners do something different. Your baby likely is getting soothed most of the time so don’t think these occasional instances have done damage or anything like that but hopefully you can get him on the same page.
4 months is too young 😞
Ugh. Maybe a family parenting class?...
So basically he just ignores her while she cries?? During her awake periods? That's basically neglect. Have you taught him how to look after a baby?
That’s way too young to implement any form of sleep training in my opionion
AWFUL poor baby. Neglect at its finest. Stop what you’re doing and GO AND GET THEM. Me and my husband would never let our baby cry it out even if we are there all night with her.
The cry it out method isn’t harmful or cruel in itself, it just makes parents feel bad. The studies on it are really inconclusive, as are most sleep training studies. The ideas that your baby will feel abandoned are also theories that can’t really be proven. None of can probably say, “I hate my parents because they let me cry it out”. Too many things in between being a baby, childhood, and adulthood shape our lives and whether we have abandonment issues or not. Sleep training is unique to each child and parent and what works for them. I personally didn’t do cry it out. My daughter naturally chose to sleep and soothe herself early on. However, what you boyfriend is doing also doesn’t sound like sleep training. It sounds like he just doesn’t want to parent. If he doesn’t know how to soothe her, maybe try talking to him and showing him. Also, maybe try checking in with his mental health.
My husband was really helpful the first month and then around month 3 or 4, he just stopped helping. I found him just staring at her while she screamed in her bed one night. After talking about how he was feeling (and a trip to the doctor), it turned out that he was depressed and super stressed from the months of no or bad quality sleep, worry, stress from work, etc.
Yes bc ur supposed to do it sometimes to let them learn if not it can affect them in the long run there doctor will tell u its ok to do it sometimes and walk away to take a breather if u dont let them learn they cant fully develop there crying there screaming and to sooth there self
@Sophia honestly no. Disgusting. No one will change my mind.
No way, that cry disturbs me , irritates me and I can’t concentrate on what I am doing so I will definitely pick my baby up since crying is only way of them communicating
@Courtney girl what the hell are u talking about.. I’m not the same person and also ive heard mixed things about it, im a first time mom so thats why i came on here to ask. Also i dont do this my bf does sometimes. I have let him know i dislike it and that it’s not helpful/unnecessary. He thinks I’m trying to disrupt his parenting. I hate it
Definitely not okay. You can read the book "the nurture revolution" by Greer Kirshenbaum for more info on the baby brain and what is good or bad for it.
No one knows how to soothe a baby until you have your baby and try multiple things to find what works. Try to encourage him to try the things that work for you and baby and he’ll soon figure out his own way to soothe. My partner had to be told how I soothed our little girl in the beginning to prompt him to find ideas that works for them x
I would not be leaving my child with him until he learns how to soothe her. Tbh I wouldn’t even stay with a partner who didn’t want to learn or didn’t listen to me on this. Leaving a child to cry is cruel and super harmful. There are lots of resources and data you can find online which highlight this. You need to speak with him again, educate him, and set some hard boundaries. Most of all please protect your little one through this process. Maybe ask for help from family or friends if you can.