Genuine Question
My daughter is 8 months old and I visit my In-Laws every single Sunday....And my MIL still complains that it is not good enough and that she wants to be around my daughter ALL THE TIME. She has asked numerous times to babysit her since she was 3 months old and I EXCLUSIVELY BREASTFEED. I find it abnormal that she thinks it is okay to even suggest babysitting at such an early age. This is my first child and I enjoy being a mom. I want to spend time with my own daughter and my MIL makes me feel guilty for doing that. She also calls my husband every single day asking for pictures and video calls so she can see my daughter. It honestly gets annoying because she acts like she doesn't see her at all. My MIL has also thrown shade my way by saying that she was raised family-oriented and that HER parents would take HER kids everywhere. And she would never tell them no because they are the elderly and it is their grandchildren, etc.
I just feel like it is not the same comparison....I am not HER daughter and MY parents do not overstep my role as a parent. I want to be a mom and I want to raise my kids. My parents respect that and allow me to spend as much time with my daughter. It is not my fault that my MIL let her parents raise her kids and she should not feel entitled to raising mine. She missed out on that opportunity.
My husband works Monday-Friday so Saturday and Sundays are his only days off...
Is my MIL overreacting with only seeing my daughter once a week or I should bring my daughter around more often? I have a brother who lives in Minnesota with my niece and I only get to see them twice a year. I live in California. So I feel like my MIL is being ungrateful that she gets the opportunity to see my daughter numerous times in a year.
(P.S. my MIL is an alcoholic and a narcissist. She drinks beer every single day and makes every situation about herself. She got upset that my husband and I were going out of town for MY BIRTHDAY because she would not see my daughter until the following Sunday. How selfish can you be?!? I honestly don't like being around her and don't want my daughter to be around such a negative influence as she gets older.)
Show your support
"I m happy you felt confortable at giving your child's education in your parents hands but we will raise our kid on our own. See you next Sunday if you want to. If not we can still reprogram another time".
Your husband should talk to her. Let his mother know that you makes the rules and she should be grateful she even see the baby considering the state she’s in. Your child doesn’t need to be around an alcoholic
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You said it yourself. Her parents raised her kids, so now she thought she would get a second chance at raising her son's kids. It's a generational issue, which means it's her problem to deal with. She's projecting her lack of parenting and voicing her needs and wants when she had kids, so instead of growing and wanting different for her son, she's expecting you to follow the cycle. Good for you for setting boundaries, but if those two days are your husband's only days off I would also plan things for you three to do. This is your family to build memories with. Last thing you want is to recent this experience and when your children have their own you continue this toxic cycle. Also narcissistic and alcoholic is a combination for just the worst to come. Sooner or later she's going to be making your daughter's events all about her and ruining her stuff.