Love

Do you love them like a best friend or like a random person that you wouldn't want to suffer because you value human life? It's ok to be in a weird place for a while, especially after having kids, but do you both want to be back in an "in love" place? (whatever that means...) Try couples counseling and see if you can reconnect. If you can't/won't step aside and let each other find love. If you love someone you want the best for them, even if it's not with you. ❤️

I think it can be healthy to not always be in love but love them and know they are your person. I was in love a lot as a young person, and that fades, clearly but I love my husband and can’t see myself with anyone else but I’m not always “in love”. That’s a feeling, not a constant, imo

Yes. Love changes over time. From passionate love to a more comfortable love. Similar to the love you feel for a family member, except you find them physically attractive too. Initially love is exciting, you want to be with them all the time, can’t stop looking at them, always want to touch them, feel the butterflies and all the rest of it. That’s what people usually think of when they think of being “in” love. Around the 18m-2 year mark that kind of love usually ends and is replaced with a more mellow love. You still find them attractive, still deeply care for them, but it’s not that obsessive passionate love anymore. That’s normal. You also go through ups and downs I find. Sometimes I feel deeply in love with my partner, often we just feel like roommates. Also normal and still very much a healthy relationship.

Yes. It is normal for the initial in love time to gradually move towards loving someone as family. As long as you are still enjoying being intimate, it is completely natural to have more of a routine and predictability and maybe less passion.

It depends on what you mean, what your standards for a relationship are, and how it affects other parts of the relationship. If it was a dead bedroom thing and there were other issues, I wouldn't think it was healthy. If it's just that you're not feeling crazy passion, it could just be a phase and still a healthy relationship.

If you’re still in the postpartum period, I’d say it’s normal. I went through so many phases of feelings toward my husband for the 2 years postpartum. After I started feeling more regulated, our relationship got better again and I definitely feel in love again