Feeling insecure

My stepdaughter is 13 . Her mom had her when she was young and had time to “bounce back”. My daughter Is 1.5. And I had her at 33. I know age shouldn’t matter and that bouncing back after a baby in general is hard . I somehow feel insecure . It’s like the flamingo comparison of “getting your pink back” . I feel like bm is still young and has more time for herself because step daughter is obviously more independent at 13 . I know I shouldn’t compare . Idk if I’m just jealous of the time she has for self care . I just feel old because all the people I know around my age all has kids who are in middle school while mine is still a baby . I feel like I have no time for myself :/ Then it makes me more insecure that everyone says how good she looks . I know I should do things not because of her but simply to take care of myself but I don’t know how to . I feel like I’m trying to find myself after having a baby