I am such a jealous grinch

It's the 3rd time my husband deleted all his social media and all he has left is whatsapp for his own screen time. Again the reason is his "distraction" so I asked him about what is distracting him, he hesitated so I felt it must be also the women he sees on shorts and instagram. He said, yes, partially. I don't know why but I couldn't help but feel horrible thinking that it must occupy his brain so badly he decided to just delete everything to not be "distracted" anymore from daily life. Poor guy, he was busy trying to explain me for 2 hours that it's "fleeting impulses" that he feels attraction to other women and through self control pushes them aside because he wants to desire only me but my inner dark side was telling me that he is so disgusting for looking at other women in this way when we have such steaming passionate sex every other day. I asked him, what kind of thoughts it is, is it A:"Oh shoot she is beautiful!" Or:"I want to fuck her right now!" And he said it's sometimes the first one and sometimes the ladder but "it's just impulses and normal and he works on himself". But I dont know...it just turns me off completely to the point where I think I'd rather have him go after the impulses and see what it's like instead of having them revisiting him all the time so that he has to delete social media. But again, he told me that this is just a small reason of why he did that and I feel like such a psychopath for being such a jealous grinch. Can someone pls tell me if you ever feel in similar ways too or am I just a Scorpio on her period?đŸ˜«đŸŠ‚
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I mean you should be glad he deleted it but he should keep it deleted. My husband just deleted TikTok bc TikTok’s of women kept popping up and it caused problems with us so he chose us over lust. I get jealous too and it hurts me.

@Ashby I know! I just hate the fact that women will have space in his head if just looked at. Like, I see sexy man on the street or social media but i don't need to distance myself like that because I don't think about them😑 like come on, I drive him absolutely mad in bed, why is there even space for more? He was trying to drill into me that it has nothing at all to do with how satisfied he is with me. But for me as a woman it doesn't make sense

Girl, ask a therapist with an open mind. My therapist honestly put me in my place and reminded me that these thoughts can be natural, so long they don’t take it too far. It’s 100% okay to think others are attractive, and I KNOW it’s hard to live with that. You can’t tell me you have not once thought about other men and how attractive they *can* get. Women, everywhere, are attractive. If men everywhere were attractive, your man would be in your position right now fighting for his life. He deleted his socials and was so very honest with you babe, that’s a good man. My ex did it all behind my back and couldn’t even excuse it properly.

He has a porn addiction, my husband has one as well. He used to watch TikTok girls and Onky Fans before he met me and since he’s met me and I’ve set the boundary that I am not okay with that, he has tried not to watch it. By that I mean he messed up twice, I caught him when we first started dating still having Only Fans cause he didn’t delete it. He unfortunately left that option open. Saw how much it hurt me and deleted it. Then again recently but with TikTok, I caught him he tried to hide it (bad choice) and he again knew he fucked up and chose to delete it because he chose my wellbeing over that. I deleted it in front of him after he asked me to. Your husband needs therapy. To talk about the problem, to not download things that would have him lust ir emotionally cheat. Ignore the ones saying it’s okay. ITS OK to hate it. It’s okay to NOT want it. It’s crazy they’re telling you you’re wrong.

@Lynn were human, of course it’s natural. It doesn’t make it okay, you’re married. You shouldn’t Lust for another woman or a man. I personally do not have these thoughts about other men, I have self control. I can admit one is attractive and move on, I do not sit on it and imagine things I would do. If it’s bad enough to where he admits it’s occupying a lot of his time and mind. That’s not okay, luckily he did tell her and he deleted his socials but if it’s so bad he has to therapy for HIM is needed. She just needs to set a boundary explaining what she doesn’t like and what they need to work on together. As a human being it’s natural to lust, as a married man, you need better self control and to not look at other women. Your duty is to your wife not your own desires.

@Ashby Hi, my husband used to have a porn addiction before me but since we're together he never watched it and always keeps a distance from women. But I didn't know that it requires "self control" of him for that.

@Ashby Yeah. I just believe him in him telling me that that was not THE reason why he deleted it and why he spent so much time on it but because he was addicted to social media in general and watching a lot instead of doing more for his own life. But yes, addiction is still addiction

@Ashby idk how you gathered that I’m apparently married in my comment lol

@Lynn i said “you’re married” as in ops husband, or for example anyone that is married. Not YOU exactly, I should’ve found a better way to phrase that, but my point was when you’re married there’s different expectations.

This is why I don't date men who are on socials. Alternatively if they were I used their socials to see what type of person they were and never saw positives. I think men should not have so much time on their hands to just idle away on socials and aren't even making money off it. I hope you can manage to resolve this issue. It's alot. X

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