My ex is twisted acting like it's my fault. Do you think it is at all?

So my ex told me when we broke up and I was 5 months pregnant that if I broke up with him I would raise the baby alone because he didn't want that responsibility without a partner because he "can't and won't" do that and wasn't down to co parent. I still left him anyways cuz he's a butthead and drinks immature ect. Okay so now baby is about to be a year old and I told him he needs to stop seeing the baby on random moments at my place because he got really controlling stalky and weird and mean with me. I moved and won't tell him where. I told him if he wants I will meet him at a family members home and drop of baby for him to have a visit any day he chooses. I even set it up for this week with his granny on Wed and Sunday. He said no. He said he will only care for the baby if I'm there. If I leave he doesn't want to. Now he is acting sad saying I'm pathetic and keeping him from his child and I'm going ro ruin my kids life because I won't let him see him at my new home or spend time with them together. I said are you not willing to do the deal I set up at all ever? He said if I'm not present then no. So in my opinion I tried. He's like leaving me messages crying telling me his child will forget him making me feel like shit but like I just don't want to be around this manipulative crazy rude man who has said awful shit to me. Them having a relationship shouldn't need to involve me at all. Right? Or am I the a hole here?

Show your support

He's just trying to use your child to work his way back into your life. My ex tried that shit but kept saying, "If you're not there, then I don't want to" so I told him he could see me and our child in a therapist office and suddenly he wasn't interested and has not contacted me since.

He is the a-hole! You did everything in your power for your son to be able to see his dad on regular bases! His dad doesn't want to coz you're not present... You are not together, you don't want to see or be near the man, you don't have to be! He said it loud and clear, he doesn't want to see his son! That's on him not on you! Much love and a ton of strength 💞

Good grief, men You not alone - my x narc similar He now not seen her for a year, down to his own actions - but he don’t tell ppl that, of course Babes he’s still trying to control you n using any attempt to keep any control as he has none. He’ll continue to do it as well, don’t feel bad, you’ve done what you can n he’s not. It’s down to him to change ways but most men like that, never do. It’s everyone else problem / fault when actually need a good, hard look in mirror. I’d keep up the contact with the family n just be prepared for wen he does show up But if don’t feel comfortable then ask for other arrangements with the family n not him

Have a record of all conversations of him saying theses things xx

@Alexandra it's sad to some extent that they can't step up for thier own kid... and also like okay good I don't want there to be that bad influence anyways. It's not about the baby it's about me. And now I think it's about to be all about punishing me tbh ,b.c. I went ahead and filed for full custody he just doesn't know yet

@Liberty I do have some of it. Other stuff was said in person in the past. Hope I have enough to hold up against him

@Emma yes of course. Probably tells everyone it's your fault right? They are so predictable with the victim-y mindset. And you're right it is about control. He's mad that I moved and he can't stalk my every move. Says I better not have a man around lol like if it was about the baby I think he would just ask to see the baby and leave me alone

@Radka thank you! Exactly. I feel like I was doing the right thing by offering. I tried and now I think I will just let him speak to my inbox and won't be answering he is full of lies

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌