Hear me out girls

So I’ve been with my partner 10 years 2 years ago he cheated why I was pregnant with his child , we had a argument a few days before and I said it was over out of anger & ignored his calls . Anyway he ended up planning to meet a girl 4 days later & he did what he did . Soon after I broke up with him due to struggling with the miscarriage & him cheating when I was so poorly with the pregnancy in & out of hospital . Fast forward 14 months later I got speaking to him again and we decided to try again I was totally honest in saying I dnt trust him and he’s gunna have to prove himself .. 2 months later he proposed but since proposing he’s shown no interest in the engagement or the wedding and k feel he’s done it because I said he had to prove himself . Am I being silly in thinking this I’ve gave him the ring back & said until he shows it’s what he wants I don’t want it

Show your support

I feel like because I said he had to prove himself & make it known he did that as a spear of the moment but not truly have the intentions . It’s been 6 months and he’s spoke about it twice & both times it’s because I’ve got on to him about showing no interest . Feel really hurt by his lack of intest & effort making plans.

I dont think your silly in thinking anything and just know your feelings are COMPLETELY valid! In my opinion… this sounds like he’s love bombed you. He’s given you everything you want.. wined and dined.. proposed.. now he’s withdrawn it because he has you back. I don’t know the man ofcourse but from this short explanation he sounds like a narcissist. Also id like to say I’m so sorry about your miscarriage. Nobody deserves that. Im sorry he cheated on you and put you through so much stress also. He should be showing more interest and planning your big day. It’s a big deal and should be one of the most exciting & special days of your life. I completely understand why you are hurt. Do not doubt yourself. Do not excuse your feelings. And do not settle for less! You’ve said he needs to prove himself.. stand on that! This is not him proving himself. You deserve better.

Did he cheat on you or did he have sex with someone in the break?

You are possibility asking him to do so much proving and what he needs to do is show you he’s committed and helping. If you cut him off for 14 Months that means he’s missed his child growing up??? He’s probably panicking and trying to do anything to calm you down. I might be getting the wrong end of the story but from my view I understood he had sex with someone on a break you made and now you’re hurt by it. Which he didn’t mean to do. You have been estranged from Him ever since and now he’s back in he just wants to see his child and possibly be close to you but - as it was - not get married, just be your bf and a father. Your best bet is to sit back and watch how he behaves without your prompts. IF you did cut him off for having sex during a break then that’s pretty irrational and he’s responding irrationally to smooth things out

@Jane I had a miscarriage the weekend he slept with another woman , he definitely wanted to do it he slept with her & was planning to do it again with another woman before I Ovb found out about it

Ohh no I didn’t see the miscarriage bit!!! I misread it all then. Sorry! Hold on

I think this is VERY wise, marriage shouldn’t be taken lightly and it seems it was a meaningless gesture to make you happy - you shouldn’t get married if you have any doubts!!

Do not marry a man who has shown you he can't be loyal to you and isn't interested in actually showing you effort (the grand gestures are just to keep you hooked).

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌