Urgent - Advice Please!

I left my BD house last week after an extreme argument where he totally disrespected me and demanded a DNA test for his son (completely unwarranted). I left the house and went to my mother’s house 200 miles away and told him he can travel to come see the baby but that I need time and space before I bring the baby to him. He tormented me every single day, screaming down my phone and sending me relentless messages to bring his baby back and that I had no right to take him. I sought legal advice and I totally had the right and invited him to come see the baby which is what I was told to do. In his frantic communication he has told me to “keep him”, that I would regret what I’ve done, that he will go to jail for his son and that he is willing to abandon him. He has also said that he has plans to go abroad now. He has also said he never wants the baby around my family again. From one second to the next I have no clue what he’s going to say. I’ve been having mental breakdowns because of the non stop demands that I travelled down with baby to see him. He is playing on his PlayStation not even paying attention to his son and hasn’t said barely a word to me. I feel like a fool and don’t know how to approach the situation or what to do. I feel like the control is always in his hands and I am also scared of him.

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It sounds like such a hard situation but you've got to be strong and think about what your baby needs. Listen to this man's actions because words mean nothing when they're so conflicting. If you're scared of him I'd urge you to get back to your mums asap and let him do the work from now on, it'll show how much he really cares about his son x

This^ I'd be getting myself out of that environment as safely as you can with your son and go right back to my mums if you're able to do so. Stay strong and leave it down to him to do all of the work!

Screenshot and save EVERYTHING! I’m so sorry you’re going through this!

Go back to a safe place for you and your baby, he isn’t worth the drama and is just tormenting you. Keep any messages/voicemails and stop answering his calls, if you respond to any texts keep it civil and keep it about baby. He isn’t worth the stress and he clearly doesn’t actually care for either of your wellbeing. If you say he has to come see the baby then that is on him to come - you aren’t withholding baby and caving to take baby to go see him just shows him that he can treat you/your baby like this and you’ll give into his demands. Stay strong beautiful mama, you got this! Look after yourself ❤️

@Erin omg thankfully yes I did since the explosive argument!

@Sharnee I regret caving in so much. My family are exhausted with the stress this has caused them and I honestly thought he would do something if I didn’t come. Meanwhile here he is asking someone way younger than him to bring him food cause he doesn’t drive. I’m so pissed off at myself

Don’t be mad at yourself, show yourself some kindness ❤️. It’s a tough situation, it’s stressful and on top of that I don’t know if your a ftm/how old baby is but either way it’s a huge learning curve and adjustment. If he *tries* anything at all - call the police, show them the messages, get a restraining order. Do whatever you gotta do to look after your beautiful self and your baby. Because both of you deserve so much better hun. And you don’t owe that POS anything.

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