Feeling Defeated

I feel like such a failure. I so badly have wanted to breastfeed my baby since she was born. She was too smash to latch at first and now refuses to try to latch because she's used to a bottle (she's 3 months old). I also barely produce any milk and have to heavily supplement with forbids to feed her enough. I'm going through a ton of stress and just want to feel like I'm doing something right, but I'm on the verve of giving up on pumping because the last several times I've only gotten a few drops even though I had been very consistent. I don't know what to do anymore.

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Here are some things you’re doing right: Adapting quickly to unforeseen circumstances, like a tiny baby who struggled to latch. Trying and trying and trying even though it’s really hard. Feeding a growing, thriving baby. If I’ve learned anything at all during my short few years of motherhood, it’s to relinquish the binds of your own expectations, embrace the unexpected, and count your wins. I bet the instances of motherhood looking exactly the way it did when it was imagined are very very rare, and just as this is an unexpected disappointment, there will be a thousand unexpected delights along the way. Your feelings of disappointment are real and valid - to look forward to breastfeeding and not be able to hurts - but the voice in your head telling you you’re fucking this up is wrong. You’re doing everything you need to do to keep your baby healthy and her tummy full.

As long as they are pooping and peeing in their diaper, and they are smiling and giggling, you are doing absolutely everything that you can in the world! Doesn’t matter what goes in at this point in regards to formula or breastmilk, it’s about what you are seeing come out of her and also the love and the attention and the gratitude. You are an amazing mama! Put it on a Post-it note by your mirror and tell yourself that every day! You need some affirmations just to remind you, because you’ve been through a lot in this journey and I completely understand two times over what that’s like. Just remind yourself, and keep looking at her smiles, eventually you will start to live in the moment a bit more. 🙏🏽

Eat oats, drink plenty of water. Legendairy supplements have dramatically improved my production I took liquid gold and cash cow together. Make sure you pump at night. See a lactation consultant.

@Alice I've tried every suggestion anyone had ever given me to increase my supply. I also worked with a lactation specialist for 3 months, but it never got any better. That's partially why I'm so upset about it. I put in a lot of work and didn't see any results.

I’m sorry I can understand how upset you are I would be too😞

Don’t be hard on yourself mama. I wanted to breastfeed so bad and my goal was to make it to a year I made it to 4 and a half months. Be proud of what you have accomplished. Sending lots of love and positive vibes 💕

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