Holiday emotions?

So I live in a city where I have zero family of my own so it’s only my ex husbands family here and I just had a hysterectomy Friday so I’m trying to recover from that, just got my kids dropped off yesterday because 5 days is enough of them with the father 😑 but they are back home and with cold like symptoms so now I’m finding myself pushing myself a bit more than what I can all day and all I want to do is just lay down and cry because I can’t do more than what I can. If you read this far thank you because it seems as much as I want to let it out or talk to someone it feels like I’m being ungrateful or complaining too much. My feeling are just all over the place with the holidays going on and being alone. Im just so tired