Tantrums and preschool

I don’t think he’s playing up to you Is preschool new? Has he normally been home with you? It’s a HUGE transition and he is likely struggling (especially atm this is a LONNNGGG half term!! Hell I’m struggling hahaahah!!) He is expressing his emotions in a way he knows how to with people he feels comfortable with etc Does he talk about preschool? Have any friends? Maybe try finding out what his days like

My little one is the same. Every morning we have drop off he’s screams and shouts and cries. Within seconds of the door being closed he stops!! He doesn’t wanna leave his mamma! It get easier, and the screaming and shouting does lessen!! You’ve got this! Xx

@Amy yes, this is his first half term. They’ve said if you didn’t know, you wouldn’t know how he behaves before going. He’s made loads of friends, joins in and talks about what he’s done with his day. I think I’d find it easier if he was unsettled when there.

If he was unsettled there too, it would upset you more . All this is totally normal. My little man always says he doesn't want to go either , few tears. But once there, he's fine. He feels safe with you to let his emotions out as frustrating and upsetting as it is. Xxx

It’s hard to see them cry 😢 a few bits that worked for me, and might help if you haven’t tried it - The most successful thing that helped me was to create excitement with the lunch, with my sons school we pack their lunches and instead of telling him I’ve packed a lunch I say I’m packing a picnic and go through what might be in it but I don’t show him his lunch so it’s a ‘surprise’ when he opens it in school, and now he does be so excited for his ‘picnic’ , I also got library books on school and making friends and instead of talking about school in the morning talk about something else so it’s not the main focus of the morning ie using distraction, I found these little changes worked for me, I did trial and error to see how to get him out the door without tears,😂 my son was telling me he was scared of school which is understandable as it’s a lot but that’s where the books helped- wishing you luck, hope you find something that works x

We’re going through the exact same thing. It’s been the same since his 3rd birthday when we also bought a baby home two weeks later. He’s fine with going to preschool now, the consistency kicked in and that’s part of his routine. He’s also absolutely fine when we go out anywhere etc. but as soon as he steps foot in the door or comes round from waking up it’s world war three over everything. We’ve been trying lots of different tactics and trying to understand what triggers him etc but top and bottom of it I think is he’s a three year old who has lots of emotions and doesn’t know how to handle them. He keeps them in check whilst out and at preschool but as soon as he feels safe at home they all come flooding out.. We’ve found some one on one attention, and doing things he likes before he asks for things he can’t do can help, not always. For preschool, just keep going, consistency is key. So is routine. We talked about what he’ll be doing when he gets home.

@Sophia thanks for your reply! Yes we do a guided tour of his lunchbox every morning to see what he’s got 😂 Some books is a good shout! He also says he’s scared of the teachers! But I know he’s not as he talks about everything he does with them too. Toddlers aye!!

@Rebecca it’s so tough isn’t it? We’ve got another due in a couple of weeks and I was hoping he’d be a bit more settled by then, but I think I’m expecting too much and need to just accept it’s going to be very strange for him for a while!

If he’s wiping away the the tear as soon as your gone and goes in a gets on with his day I’d says (with 10yrs worth of preschool experience) that he’s putting on a show for you to make you feel guilty…. If he was genuinely upset about going to preschool the tears would continue at preschool!

@Laura yes I think this too! Any suggestion how to overcome it or just keep persevering?

I’d just keep going but also big up preschool and how boring your day will be whilst he’s at there. We had one last year who put on a show for mum every single day until she left for school… she never did it when her nanny or dad dropped off purely for mum! But mum used to pander to it and carry her to preschool and then would promise all sorts of sweets treats and bribes to stop the crying.

We tell him the little one goes to baby school, a bit of a harmless white lie so he doesn’t think he’s missing out x