Venting Post its long

Yall Im so hot right now and need advice. Ive been literally experiencing PPD in my 8th month of postpartum. Ive been doing the best I can to not feel low and honestly it’s a damn battle daily. Im an entrepreneur and really trying to catch up on things after depleting my savings to have my child via Midwifery and stay at home for about 5 months after birth. Anyways, going into postpartum the care of my children was extremely important to me so I ended up hiring a nanny. Absolutely no complaints about the woman I chose. However, tonight when I got in after putting in 9 plus hours my oldest daughter really was acting funny with me. She didn’t really want to hug or kiss me when I got home. But, she crawled all over the nanny when it was time for her to go. Now I try to give my daughter attention since I now have a 8mo and understand that she may feel some type of way about sharing me now because she is ultimately a mommies girl. Shes always been super affectionate toward me except for tonight. After I cooled down a bit and asked her what’s up she said she sometimes just don’t feel like hugging and kissing me. Umm but you just almost choked your caretaker hugging her tonight. It seemed like an excuse and I’m still pissed. Can someone chime in on this. I’m really angry because there’s just so much chaos right now in my life and all I want to do is love on my family and here I am feeling rejected even by my own children. Is this just PPD or what? Someone chime in with a positive evaluation please.

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How old is your oldest daughter? It may have just been because the nanny was leaving whereas you were coming home. I bet she gives you hugs when you leave tomorrow 🫶

@Alexis she’s 7

I think it's natural that your eldest is starting to have more of a bond with the nanny over you since she's home all day with the kids. We all have days when we're not in the mood to do something even though the other person is in the mood. Could just be a one off. I wouldn't say PPD I would say everyone has bad days and good days and today she wasn't in the mood to give mom love. Hopefully tomorrow. x

Another way to look at this is that your caring really well for your family - you are out earning money and providing and you’ve done so well choosing the right nanny that they are super happy with her. It would be far more worrying if they didn’t want to hug her or if they were afraid of her. Kids throw curve balls - I know it must have been disappointing to not get the usual kiss and cuddle when you got home from work but I’m sure she didn’t mean anything by it! ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Also at 7 years old they do start to be more independent; I’ve got an 8 year old and hormones and all sorts kick in at this age.

Thanks y’all for the responses. Just for clarity. My 7yo is in 2nd grade and enjoyed doing crafts and stuff with nanny after school. I’m happy that my kids love the nanny. Hell I love the nanny. I’m talking about cringing and avoiding affection toward me and then less than 5 minutes later almost choking the nanny hugging her sho tight.

@Rachel thank you

my siblings and i grew up with a nanny but fortunately our mum was around as well. Whats unfortunate was my dad worked abroad and wasn’t around all the time. We were all distant from him and now we’re estranged. We loved our nannies and they’ve become very close family friends. I guess what I’m saying is, your 7yo sees your nanny more often, spends more time with her and has grown to be comfortable with her, something I’m sure you’re grateful about. You see where i’m going with this. “Time” is precious here. Now that i have my own child and not have as much resources, the thought of going back to work and not spend as much time as i want with my son devastates me. God bless to us mumma!

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